Gender Nonconforming

Photo credit: Hearst Owned
Photo credit: Hearst Owned

In most societies, each gender comes with its own set of expectations (think: men wear pants and women wear dresses or boys wear blue and girls wear pink).

“There is a way that gender is expected to be performed in society in relation to assigned sex at birth that many, many people conform to and perform throughout their lives in different ways,” says Courtney D’Allaird, assistant director of Gender and Sexuality Resource Center at the University of Albany.

But gender nonconforming people do not subscribe to those expectations.

D’Allaird confirms that “gender nonconforming” is an umbrella term that encapsulates “essentially anyone/thing that challenges and/or subverts accepted gender expectations.” The term is extremely broad and, per D’Allaird, can relate to “how you live your life that most people cannot just see by looking at you, or it can be how you perform gender through clothing, hairstyle, etc.”

THE DIFFERENCE AMONG GENDER NONCONFORMING, NONBINARY, AGENDER, AND GENDER QUEER

While nonbinary people reject the binary gender structure as a whole, gender nonconforming people “are more likely to have a sense of their own gender,” says D’Allaird. That being said, D’Allaird maintains that while they may have a sense of their gender, gender nonconforming people “still challenge and subvert gender stereotypes and expectations.”

A similar distinction can be made between gender nonconforming and agender people. And while agender people “do not experience themselves as a gender at all,” gender nonconforming people are “usually not talking about themselves as not a gender,” says D'Allaird. They, instead, are in some way not conforming to “the gender expectations of the society they navigate.”

Genderqueer” is the most comparable term to “gender nonconforming”—in fact, D’Allaird says the two terms are often viewed as interchangeable. “Genderqueer is just saying I am gender different, and throughout time, being gender different has pretty much always meant nonconforming,” they explain.

Related terms:

Nonbinary
Agender
Genderqueer

WHAT IDENTIFYING AS GENDER NONCONFORMING LOOKS LIKE

There’s no one way for a gender nonconforming person to look. “People who identify as GNC look like everything,” explains D’Allaird. “It’s not always something you can see today.”

D’Allaird also points out that our country is currently in the midst of “a kind of pivotal reconstruction of gender expectations.” What it looks like to identify as gender nonconforming will continue to evolve.

“I think if you use GNC as an identity today, you’re likely talking about a larger umbrella of identities that you are not piecing out for someone who asks. They are likely asking because something you are wearing or something you are doing is challenging that person’s notion of gender norms in the first place,” says D’Allaird. “So they should really stop making assumptions.”

HOW TO SUPPORT FRIENDS OR PARTNERS WHO IDENTIFY AS GENDER NONCONFORMING

Here are some impactful ways D’Allaird recommends showing your support for your gender nonconforming friends and partners:

It’s really not that hard, right? Just let people…be.

You Might Also Like