My First Impressions of All 30 ‘Bachelor’ Contestants (Including the Turtle Princess)
The holidays are over, and it’s time to give ourselves television’s answer to a season of peace and good will toward men: watching a bunch of contestants getting blown around by a giant fan and trying their tight 5 on an unsuspecting boy pilot who drinks straight from the hose (a.k.a. the new season of The Bachelor.)
ABC gave us the greatest Christmas gift of all when they dropped the bios for this cast of characters in December—I’ve spent weeks looking forward to meeting these women with nicknames like “Turtle Princess” who have fears like “murky waters and chicken on the bone.” I had high hopes, and these ladies absolutely did not disappoint. Who’s got their...
