I have bad news for all the aliens reading this: The Storm Area 51 "raid" has officially been canceled. Save your Naruto runs for another day, because it is O-VER. The Facebook event joke that became less and less funny as people got way into it is now no more.
"Alienstock" was supposed to take place in Nevada next week, but the mastermind behind the operation has dipped out. Matty Roberts is no longer involved in the invasion because he's worried people will actually take it seriously.
“It’s a fantastic relief,” Roberts told the Las Vegas Review-Journal. “I’ve had a lot of concerns leading up to Alienstock. Just to see all those come to a head 11 days before the event is kind of a relief.”
It's also probably a relief to the Air Force, which issued a super formal statement that basically said, "please do not do this" after people took it way too seriously.
“It was either going to go one of two ways,” Roberts said. “We saw the red flags and we pull out, or we could have ignored those and have it turn into a Fyre Festival 2.0 on our hands. That’s not something I want to be part of. To move to the event to downtown Las Vegas, where’s there’s infrastructure, medical, security, and everything is set in place, that’s fantastic.”
In short: It's canceled. So if you were planning to show up for some reason...just don't.
Original story 7/19:
Sad your many years of schooling never equipped you with knowledge of aliens like you’d hoped? Genuinely interested in the concept of extraterrestrial life? Care to possibly see an alien live and in person for the first time in your life?? Well, great news, dude!
Two weeks ago, Facebook user @ShitPostingInShambles created an event with two other users titled “Storm Area 51, They Can’t Stop All of Us” that’s set to take place September 20. The mission of the Area 51 invasion? Simply put, to storm Area 51 and “see them aliens.” Since the event’s creation, more than (wait for it!) 1.1 million people have signed up to join in on the fun and run Naruto-style into Area 51 in Amargosa Valley, Nevada.
In full, the event description reads, “We will all meet up at the Area 51 Alien Center tourist attraction and coordinate our entry. If we Naruto-run, we can move faster than their bullets. Let’s see them aliens.”
Still lost? You have every right to be, TBH, but don’t worry. Here, a detailed explanation of what this Area 51 raid is all about and how you can join if you want to be part of this possibly fake, deeply questionable event.
So...exactly what is this all about?
Well, that part remains really unclear so far. There’s no explanation about why the event was created or why it got so much traction, but after spreading through the internet like wildfire, it’s clear that thousands of people believe in extraterrestrial life either jokingly...or not!
Okay, but is this sh*t for real though?
This part remains up in the air, so we’ll have to wait until September to find out. There are two valid reasons that the post reads as a big fat joke, and that’s because (1) it’s literally attached to a sh*t-posting Facebook page and (2) the event description mentions running like Naruto. For those who aren’t into anime, Naruto is a Japanese television series about a young ninja named Naruto Uzumaki who runs in a very, er, unique way. TBQH, the way Naruto runs is pretty much impossible to nail in real life. Here’s a frame of reference, since you totally need one:
Feel free to try this at home, but do NOT try this at Area 51 (unless you have a death wish)! I repeat, do NOT try this at Area 51 (unless you have a death wish)!
Although it’s highly unlikely that all 1.1 million people are going to show up to Amargosa Valley, there are some people who actually might be taking this seriously. Who knew! According to the New York Times, Little A’Le’Inn—a hotel in a nearby Nevada town—has experienced a serious uptick in callers requesting rooms on the Area 51 invasion date. “Oh, it’s insane,” Connie West, a co-owner of the inn, told The Times. “My poor bartender today walked past me and said, ‘I hate to tell you, but every phone call I’ve had is about September 20.’ They’re pretty serious. They’re coming. People are coming.”
How is Area 51 preparing for this massive influx of people?
It isn’t quite clear what specific precautions or drastic measures Area 51 will take to prevent this civilian attack from happening, but a spokesperson told the The Times that “any attempt to illegally access military installations or military training areas is dangerous.” This makes sense, considering that Area 51 is a secret military base that’s part of the Nellis Air Force Base in southern Nevada, which is designed to test and train combat aircraft...meaning that the consequences for trespassing could literally be deadly.
How are people reacting?
We’ll let the posts speak for themselves:
the aliens when they realize being freed from area 51 means they have to get a job pic.twitter.com/NKQoYIWHeS— Mira Gonzalez (@miragonz) July 14, 2019
My alien that I snuck out of area 51 asking for the WiFi password pic.twitter.com/cjFg5JPcUi— chaos (@WhosChaos) July 12, 2019
I can officially say the Area 51 meme is the greatest of all time pic.twitter.com/nu6I8FSR3y— crawl (@mason_washer) July 14, 2019
Area 51 is Doomed pic.twitter.com/5KSkspfCJ0— dank memes from the dark web (@MemesCentraI) July 14, 2019
But really, to sum it all up, if you feel so inclined to join in on the Area 51 Naruto storm hoping to meet other intelligent life forces, the reality is that you’ll probably just get into huge trouble with U.S. military forces instead. So stick to the Twitter posts, okay?
Not going to the Area 51 Storm? Here’s what you can do instead:
- Listen to Spotify’s “Let’s See Them Aliens” playlist. Spoiler alert: There are tons of intergalactic bangers on here.
- Watch the Lil Nas X animated video for “Old Town Road (Remix),” featuring Billy Ray Cyrus, Young Thug, and Mason Ramsey. They raid Area 51 in it so you don’t have to!
- Paint your face green and make alien antennae out of tinfoil. If you can’t see the alien, BE the alien.
- Gather your best girlfriends and watch E.T. the Extraterrestrial. Rinse and repeat until the urge to book a flight to Nevada fades away.
- And when you’re done with E.T., binge-watch a select few episodes of The Twilight Zone.
- Learn how to draw Marvin the Martian, like Travis did in Clueless.
- Turn up the nostalgia and play a game of Space Invaders or Galaga. You’re welcome!
- Wear an outfit that’s slime-green head to toe. The aliens will spot you from a mile (or light-years) away.
- Pretend you’re Buzz Lightyear from Toy Story and have an entire army of Little Green Men on deck. And if all else fails...
- Relish in the fact that you’re smart enough not to put your life at risk! It’s the little things, you know?
And before you leave...know that this was all kind of a joke.
Some people are taking this whole “storm Area 51” thing seriously to the point of concern, so Matty Roberts, the man responsible for the Facebook event to begin with, just weighed in publicly for the first time. And guys, repeat after me: This. Was. A. Joke!!!
“I posted it on, like, June 27 and it was kind of a joke,” Matty told the KLAS-TV station in Las Vegas, according to the New York Post. “And then it waited for, like, three days, like 40 people, and then it just completely took off, out of nowhere. It’s pretty wild.”
Now that people are genuinely booking hotel rooms and preparing to swarm, Matty is low-key worried the FBI is going to bang down his door because of all the fuss, so he’d like everyone to chill out just a little bit when it comes to humans invading extraterrestrial spaces.
“The FBI is going to show up at my house and it got a little spooky from there,” he said.
“I just thought it would be a funny idea for the meme page,” he added. “And it just took off like wildfire. It’s entirely satirical, though, and most people seem to understand that.”
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