Er, Matt James Says Rachael Kirkconnell Gave Him an “Ultimatum” Before They Got Back Together

Matt James and Rachael Kirkconnell have had...a rocky relationship, to say the least. And that’s kinda putting it lightly—during Matt’s season of The Bachelor, Rachael and the entire franchise became embroiled in controversy after photos of her attending an Antebellum, Old-South themed party surfaced, which later resulted in them breaking up just after the season wrapped. Matt and Rachael are back together now, but before making the decision to date again, Rachael actually gave Matt an ultimatum.

Matt shared what Rachael’s ultimatum was during an appearance on the Pomp podcast and said it was helpful because it gave him the push he needed to fully commit to their relationship. “She was like, ‘If you’re going to make this work, let’s do it. But if you’re not going to make it work, I’m going to let you do your own thing,’” he said.

“That’s really all I needed. It was an ultimatum that I needed,” Matt continued. “It’s been great. It was honestly a commitment that we made to each other that we were going to work on the relationship...there came a point in time where it was evident that my working on the relationship looked different than Rachael’s because I wasn’t really honoring that commitment that I made to working on the relationship.”

Matt discussing Rachael’s ultimatum comes after his WSJ Magazine profile, in which he said that he and Rachael are having some tough discussions (Rachael didn’t provide any quotes in the profile but did confirm she and Matt were back together).

“I think the best way to put it is that we can have critical conversations about being in this relationship and what I need in a partner—especially if that woman isn’t Black—to understand what comes with me and my life and being Black,” he said. “It’s on people who care about being allies to do the work to be truly antiracist, and I think it’s unfair to leave people without the ability to unlearn and be better.”

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