2023 has only been doing its thing for approximately five minutes, and we already have two celebrities out here absolutely eviscerating their exes in songs. Obviously, we're talking about 1) Miley Cyrus's "Flowers"—which she went ahead and released on Liam Hemsworth's birthday, with lyrics that are allegedly a direct reference to a Bruno Mars song he dedicated to her. And 2) Shakira's new collab with Bizarrap, where she tells her ex Gerard Piqué to work out his brain for once, comes for his new girlfriend (You traded a Ferrari for a Twingo / You traded a Rolex for a Casio), and makes a jab at his mom (who, by the way, is fully her next-door neighbor).

And while Shakira and Miley are clearly doing the most, celebrities have been roasting their exes pretty much since the dawn of time. Obviously, an entire college thesis could be written about all the times Taylor Swift has dragged her exes in lyrics (I'm assuming John Mayer sleeps with one eye open at this point), but everyone from Demi Lovato and Alanis Morissette to The Weeknd have dropped breakup songs that are pretty not-so-subtly about past relationships. (Hey, we all handle heartbreak differently, right?) And some of them have revealed kinda shocking information. It's a lot!

Anyway, check out 41 times celebs roasted their exes in songs to feel better about your own levels of petty. 🙃

In case you've been wondering, Carly Simon confirmed that "You're So Vain" is, in fact, about her ex Warren Beatty. Well, at least the second verse is. As Carly put it to People, "Warren thinks the whole thing is about him."

Fully on the floor at this, but let me revive myself to drop that second verse real quick:

You had me several years ago when I was still quite naive / Well you said that we made such a pretty pair / And that you would never leave / But you gave away the things you loved and one of them was me

Nick was beyond emo about his breakup with Miley Cyrus and channeled all his feels into Jonas Bros music (lol at his brothers having to come along for this ride). One song that's clearly about his ex? "S.O.S."—which includes the lyrics:

Told you I made dinner plans / For you and me and no one else / That don't include your crazy friends / Well I'm done / With awkward situations, empty conversations

Tell us how you really feel, Nicholas!

Miley and Nick dated for a while, and apparently they were pretty serious, because "7 Things" couldn't be more dramatic. I mean, the lyrics are next-level:

The 7 things I hate about you / You're vain, your games, you're insecure / You love me, you like her / You make me laugh, you make me cry / I don't know which side to buy / Your friends they're jerks / And when you act like them, just know it hurts / I wanna be with the one I know / And the 7th thing I hate the most that you do / You make me love you

Oh, and in case you want more proof that this song is about Nick, she's wearing a dog tag he gave her in the video.

So, here's the thing: "Don't" by Ed Sheeran isn't just about Ellie Goulding. It's about Ellie Goulding and former One Directioner Niall Horan, who allegedly hooked up while Ellie was dating Ed. Just ask these lyrics:

You didn't need to take him to bed that's all / And I never saw him as a threat / Until you disappeared with him to have sex of course / It's not like we were both on tour / We were staying on the same fucking hotel floor

While Ellie has denied that "On My Mind" is about Ed Sheeran, let's take a look at the lyrics, shall we?

Next thing that I know, I'm in a hotel with you / You were talking deep like it was mad love to you / You wanted my heart, but I just liked your tattoos

I mean, the hotel reference? The tattoos? C'mon.

Demi's going to show up on this list several times, but let's kick things off with "Gonna Get Caught," which is fully about Joe Jonas—a fact Demi herself confirmed while musing that Joe's brother Nick actually helped her write it, lol.

Lyrics include: You pull me in with your smile / You make me melt with your voice / Now I've been gone now for awhile / Just to find that I'm your seventh choice

Settle in because Shakira's lyrics to "BZRP Music Session #53" (which is CLEARLY about Gerard Piqué) include:

You left me as a neighbor to the mother-in-law / With the press at the door and the debt at the IRS / You thought you'd hurt me, but you made me tougher / Women don't cry anymore, women invoice

But that's not all! She also came for Gerard's new girlfriend with this casual verse:

You traded a Ferrari for a Twingo / You traded a Rolex for a Casio / You're going fast, slow down / Ah, a lot of gym but work your brain a little too

Please be advised that Gerard responded to this by driving around a Twingo and wearing a Casio :)

Right around the time rumors were swirling about Phoebe and Paul's breakup, Phoebe was featured on SZA's song "Ghost in the Machine." And the lyrics were...um....telling.

Ahem: You said all of my friends are on my payroll / You're not wrong, you're an asshole / Screaming at you in the Ludlow / I was yours for free

On top of releasing "Flowers" three years after finalizing her divorce from Liam Hemsworth, Miley released the song on his birthday and then sat back while fans took approximately two seconds to decode the lyrics. I mean, the line built a home and watched it burn? Tell me this song is about Liam Hemsworth without telling me this song is about Liam Hemsworth.

Joe is arguably the first super-famous ex to be called out by Tay via music—and fans suspect several of her songs are about him. (Can we take a moment to appreciate how even Joe's wife Sophie Turner couldn't deny "Mr. Perfectly Fine" is "not NOT a bop"). But the VERY first song about him was the ironic "Forever and Always"—and Taylor admitted as much on Ellen at the time. Some of the savage lyrics? Allow us...

Was I out of line? / Did I say something way too honest / Made you run and hide / Like a scared little boy

Welp. Your move, Joe...

The lyrics to "Much Better" by the Jonas Brothers are assumed to be about Tay (who, according to her, Joe dumped via an infamous 27-second phone call). Check out the lyrics:

I get a rep for breakin' hearts / Now I'm done with superstars / And all the tears on her guitar / I’m not bitter

If that's not a reference to Tay's "Teardrops on My Guitar," IDK what it is.

First there's the title: "Got My Name Changed Back." Then there's the fact that the entire song is about divorce. And THEN there's the fact that these are the lyrics:

Well I've got me an ex that I adored / But he got along good with a couple road whores

Truly speechless.

Remember when Perrie Edwards was dating Zayn Malik? Honestly, me neither, but they had a very messy split. Messy enough for Perrie to write "Shout Out to My Ex" with Little Mix, with casual lyrics like:

Guess I should say thank you / For the 'hate yous' and the tattoos / Oh baby I'm cool by the way / Ain't sure I loved you anyway / Oh, and I hope she gettin' better sex / Hope she ain't fakin' it like I did

Over to you, Zayn!

That's right, friends, "You Oughta Know" is about Dave Coulier. Which means lines like this were written with Uncle Joey from Full House in mind:

Is she perverted like me? Would she go down on you in a theater?

I'll give you a moment.

I mean, on top of the cover art for "I Hit It First" being a pixilated version of what appears to be Kim's body, the lyrics include unsubtle lines, like:

She might move on to rappers and ball players, but we all know I hit it first.

Yet, despite all that, Ray J denied that the song was about Kim, saying, "It's a song, it's not about that, it's about a concept."

K.

Don't even know where to begin on "Dear John," so let's just get into the lyrics. First up:

I lived in your chess game / But you changed the rules every day / Wondering which version of you I might get on the phone

And also:

Don't you think nineteen's too young to be played by your dark twisted games / When I loved you so?

JOHN MAYER, EXPLAIN YOURSELF.

Katy Perry's marriage to Russell Brand didn't exactly end well, and "Part of Me" is reportedly about their breakup, and including lyrics like:

You chewed me up and spit me out and you ripped me off, your love was cheap.

Something tells me these two are...not on good terms!

Shortly after his divorce from Kelsea Ballerini, Morgan Evans dropped "Over For You," implying he was blindsided by their split, with lyrics like:

How many times did you say you loved me when it wasn't true? / I'm just wondering / How long has it been over for you?

Her response incoming....

Meanwhile, Kelsea dropped "Blindsided"—and a slew of other songs about the divorce on her new EP, Rolling Up the Welcome Mat—which features lyrics that are clearly about her and Morgan's split. I mean:

I'd go write a song, and you'd go for a walk / We had to get drunk to ever really talk / I told you what I needed, didn't have to rеad my mind / So, were you blindsided or wеre you just blind?

She wins, next.

The second Olivia Rodrigo dropped "drivers license," fans assumed it was about her High School Musical: The Musical: The Series ex Joshua Bassett dating Sabrina Carpenter. The most telling lyrics?

And you're probably with that blonde girl who always made me doubt / She's so much older than me / She's everything I'm insecure about

But Olivia wasn't done with Josh after "drivers license." She also dropped "good 4 U," with !!! lyrics, like:

Well, good for you, I guess you moved on really easily / You found a new girl and it only took a couple weeks / Remember when you said that you wanted to give me the world?

So, did Joshua respond? Um, yes. In fact, some might say he literally wouldn't stop responding.

Joshua felt the need to respond to Olivia with not one, but three, songs—starting with "Crisis," where he accuses an unnamed person (clearly Olivia) of making him the bad guy:

And if you get to tell your truth, then so do I / And it's cool if you want me to play the bad guy / But don't you dare act like I didn't love you

Then there's "Secret," which Joshua dropped right around the same time and has THESE lyrics:

When woe is me stops working / I bet your songs won't sound the same / The truth you can't deny changed everything / You can't hide behind what's clear as day

And finally, this man dropped "Set Me Free," which delves into his emotions during Olivia's songs about him:

I've been running away, I've been facing my fears / Tell my mama I'm okay while I'm holding back tears / It's been a fucking year / I've been doing my time / I've been working on me / Wasn't sure I'd survive, never felt so weak / And nothing really seemed to help it

Welp, I'm exhausted and we're only halfway through this list.

Demi dropped "29" last year, and the lyrics are pretty clearly about her (much older) ex Wilmer Valderrama. The song's lyrics focus on a big age difference and include:

Finally 29 / Funny, just like you were at the time

PLUS: Thought it was a teenage dream / Just a fantasy / But was it yours or was it mine / 17, 29

Oh, and there's also this: Far from innocent / What the f–k's consent? / Numbers told you not to / But that didn’t stop you

Truly yikes.

Shortly after ending her relationship with Max Ehrich, Demi released "Still Have Me" with some pretty telling lyrics, like:

Everything around me shattered / All the highs are now just lows / But it doesn't even matter / 'Cause I'd rather be alone

Before we move onto Max's response (because, naturally, he put out his own song), reminder that their breakup was super messy. Like, Max would not stop airing their dirty laundry on Insta, and fans also found out that he publicly thirsted for other celebs before he met Demi.

Max released his breakup song shortly after Demi's and dramatically felt the need to call it "Afraid." The lyrics? Emotional, as expected:

I'm afraid to give up my heart / I'm afraid to lose against love / I'm afraid, afraid to be broken apart / So I play, I play safe / Holding my guard

:|

Pretty much all of Lemonade was about Bey and Jay's journey as a couple after he cheated, but "Pray You Catch Me" pretty much confirmed his infidelity, thanks to this lyric:

You can taste the dishonesty / It's on your breath as you pass it off so cavalier

Bey fully called out her husband in "Hold Up," singing:

Something don't feel right because it ain't right, especially coming up after midnight / I smell your secrets and I'm not too perfect to ever feel this worthless / How did it come down to this, going through your call list? / I don't wanna lose my pride but I'ma f—k me up a bitch

Honestly, the time has come to rewatch this entire visual album.

Okay, this one is a little more subtle, but when Ariana dropped "Positions," fans were CONVINCED she referenced Pete Davidson in the beginning. The song is actually about Ariana's relationship with her now-husband Dalton Gomez, but in the intro, she sings:

Heaven sent you to me / I'm just hoping I don't repeat history

And she put special emphasis on the "peat" part of "repeat," so it sounds like "PETE."

Her mind!

The Weeknd seemingly made reference to his ex Selena Gomez's kidney transplant in "Call Out My Name," with the lyrics:

I said I didn't feel nothing baby, but I lied / I almost cut a piece of myself for your life

He also got a little emo with: Guess I was just another pit stop / Til' you made up your mind / You just wasted my time

Speaking of Selena, we've officially entered the Selena Gomez / Justin Bieber portion of our time together. Starting with "Lose You to Love Me," which fully rips apart the Biebs.

On top of this...

You promised the world and I fell for it / I put you first and you adored it / Set fires to my forest / And you let it burn / Sang off-key in my chorus / 'Cause it wasn't yours / I saw the signs and I ignored it

There's this section, which seemingly references Justin moving on with now-wife Hailey Bieber:

I gave my all and they all know it / You turned me down and now it's showing / In two months, you replaced us / Like it was easy

Another song that everyone's CONVINCED is about Justin? That'd be "Feel Me." Not hard to see why, considering the lyrics are:

Every time your lips touch another / I want you to feel me

and

Won't be caught up in the middle of your highs and your lows / Baby, long as you're not with me you'll always be alone

Look, is it possible "Look at Her Now" isn't about Justin Bieber? Yes. But c'mon, these lyrics:

It was her first real lover / His too 'til he had another / Oh, God, when she found out / Trust levels went way down

Like...JUSTIN WHAT DID YOU DO!

When Gaga dropped "Fun Tonight," fans were convinced the song was about her ex Christian Carino. And if so...woof, it's no wonder she got out of that relationship.

Some particularly brow-raising lyrics?

You love the paparazzi, love the fame / Even though it causes me pain

and

I feel like I'm in a prison hell / Stick my hands through the steel bars and yell

First of all, fans realized that Taylor put "Would've, Could've, Should've" (which is reportedly about the relationship she had with John Mayer at age 19) as track 19 on Midnights. On top of that, THESE are the lyrics:

And I damn sure would've never danced with the devil at 19 / And the God's honest truth is that the pain was heaven

As one person on Twitter put it, "something tells me john mayer just jumped out of his sleep with a gasp. i know he felt a shift."

At this point, we know all too well (heh) that "All Too Well" is about Taylor's relationship with Jake Gyllenhaal (especially after she released the telling All Too Well: The Short Film, starring Sadie Sink and Jake lookalike, Dylan O'Brien). Which honestly makes 10-minute version lyrics like this alllll the more side-eye inducing:

You said if we had been closer in age / Maybe it would have been fine / And that made me want to die

The lyrics to "You Suck" are even less subtle than the title. Proof?

I hate your dumb tattoo / I wish you'd fly to the moon / Where there were no girls to use

Michael Clifford, you good?

Kay, so "Infinity" is clearly about one of Mariah's exes based on lyrics like:

Why you mad? / Talking about you mad / Could it be that you just lost the best you've ever had

and

Why you trying to play like you're so grown? Everything you own boy you still owe

But Mariah tried to shut down that narrative by claiming the song was about self-love. Which...sure, Jan!

Halsey admitted that "Without Me" is about G-Eazy (she even hired a lookalike to play him in the music video), so it's not hard to analyze the lyrics. And they fully hint at betrayal:

You don't have to say just what you did / I already know (I know) / I had to go and find out from them / So tell me how's it feel (oh-whoa)

Fans have long assumed that the lyrics to "Perfect" were about Taylor Swift, mostly because of this part:

And if you like cameras flashin' every time we go out / Oh, yeah / And if you're looking for someone to write your breakup songs about / Baby, I'm perfect / Baby, we're perfect

Anyway, here's a video of Harry Styles being incredibly awkward while being asked who the song is about!