The Big Bang Theory Season 12, Episode 11 Recap: Can We Talk About Raj and Anu's Breakup?
Uh, what just happened on tonight's The Big Bang Theory? It appears Raj and Anu have called off their engagement after three-plus months of dating, but their storyline ended so abruptly that I can't say for sure. (And I rewatched the scene three times.) What I do know, though, is that they hit their biggest speed bump to date, and the whole thing raises a lot of questions.
Let's go through this together, shall we? The episode—titled "The Paintball Scattering"—begins with Anu and Raj chatting about floral arrangements for their wedding. A chime goes off on Raj's phone, and Anu says, "Is someone texting you?" Raj tells Anu that it's his doorbell camera, and it's one of the greatest inventions ever because that's how he found out a raccoon was eating his monthly cheese delivery. Alrighty then.
Anu says she has a doorbell camera as well, but she's just never bothered to install it. Raj says it's super easy, and she'll love it, so he's happy to do it for her.
Then, later in the episode, Raj is at Howard and Bernadette's for dinner when the chime goes off on his phone. He tells them it's Anu's doorbell camera, which he helped install. (Side note: In this age of nonstop smartphone alerts, why is everyone so concerned about this chime? It's like they've never heard an alert before.)
I have no idea the protocol on these doorbell cameras, but I suppose you can have it connected to more than one phone. Otherwise, what's the point of Anu having it if she can't see who's at her door? But I don't think it's that strange for Raj to keep the app on his phone. This is his fiancé—the woman he'll be living with—so it makes sense to share access. It'd be one thing if I got the feeling he didn't trust Anu, but he really hasn't given off that impression. Then again, he's never quite been the most mature boyfriend either.
Anyway, all this to say Raj notices a guy at Anu's door carrying plastic bags. Anu gives him a hug—and not just any hug. It's more like a, "I'm really happy to see you" hug. She then invites him into her house; understandably, Raj is confused and upset.
The next day, while the entire gang decides to play paintball (Anu included), Raj decides not to say anything—for now. While I don't think he needed to apologize to Anu for what he saw, he should have brought it up right away. Anu knew he was installing her doorbell app; it's not like he did it without her permission.
Minutes into their paintball outing, though, Raj blurts out that he saw a strange man going into her house. Anu is appalled and wants to know why he was "spying" on her. Raj says that's not the point. I think he should have simply said that he wasn't spying on her, because he wasn't: When the chime went off, he looked. Of course, it's never that easy on TV, is it?
Anu admits that it was her ex-boyfriend at the door, and he was there to pick up some stuff that he left at her house. Raj implies that "stuff" means sex (oh no), but Anu says that wasn't the case. But when Raj asks if she's still talking to her ex-boyfriend on a regular basis, Anu says yes and she won't apologize for that. I get that she and Raj have only been dating for a few months, but they are engaged. Isn't that something she should have told him about? That's fine if she wants to have a friendship with her ex, but she didn't handle that revelation too well. And clearly, neither did Raj.
Anu tells Raj to delete the app from his phone, but he says, "Why? Is it because you're hiding something from me?" Anu says no, it's "because you should trust me." What both of them don't understand is that trust takes time; Anu may want Raj to trust her, but the first step is opening up about an ex-boyfriend. In Raj's case, he should have come to Anu right away without jumping to conclusions. Instead, Raj responds by asking how he can trust her when he barely knows her.
Ouch.
The fact is, though, he has a point. While you can learn a lot about a person in three months, you can't know everything. Anu asks Raj what they're doing if they can't trust each other. "Why are we planning a wedding?" Raj's response? "I don't know."
In the next scene, Anu says she's going home but he shouldn't worry...she'll wave to the doorbell when she gets there. (OK, that was actually funny.) He urges her to at least let him drive her home, but she says that's OK, she'll Uber. Meanwhile, Amy and Sheldon—who have had their own spat now that Super-Asymmetry is a thing again—offer to drive her home. And that's the end of that.
Except it isn't, because there are more questions than ever. Is the wedding called off? Postponed? Is their relationship over or just on pause? And who is this ex-boyfriend of Anu's? Does she still have feelings for him? Him for her? And why do I have as many questions as I did after This Is Us' fall finale?
Welcome to 2019, you guys. It's going to be a ride.
