Duncan Hines' Massive Microwavable Cookie is Proof That You CAN Eat Just One

Perhaps more than any other utterance in the English language, “I’ll only eat one cookie” is the greatest lie we tell ourselves and others. It’s a promise without conviction, a feeble attempt to convince friends, loved ones, and ourselves that we possess more willpower than we could ever possibly exercise.

But what if there existed a cookie large enough that we could fully satisfy our cravings while also keeping our word? Friends, I’m here to tell you that such a world is possible. That’s because Duncan Hines is here to offer you a massive, microwavable Mega Cookie that measures an impressive six inches in diameter.

Instagram food finder @ThreeSnacketeers spotted this formidably sized Mega Cookie is available in decadent double chocolate chunk, sprinkly and festive sugar cookie, and raisin-free oatmeal chocolate chip. Each of them is ready to eat after just two minutes in the microwave, and comes with an included baking pan. So in addition to gorging yourself on a single cookie, you can feel like you really earned it by “baking” it yourself.

These new Mega Cookies continue Duncan Hines’ recent streak of releasing products designed to make baking for one as simple, straightforward, and satisfying as possible. There aren’t any unicorns this time around, but we’ll take what we can get.

Theoretically, you could split this cookie with an area of roughly 28.27 inches (if what I remember from geometry class holds up) and share it with other people. But why would you do that when you’re only having one cookie?