Does Every Man Look Better With a Mustache?

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Photographs: Getty Images; Collage: Gabe Conte

Movember, when many men grow mustaches to raise money and awareness of men’s health issues, is great. However, come December first, the participant almost always shaves off the evidence of their hard work. Too often, men are entering the new year not as evolved and newly-coiffed style icons, but exactly as they were before: hairless, shivering, and devoid of the one simple addition that makes every man look better. Yes, a mustache.

This might be a controversial statement, and I’ll admit there are a few caveats. There are those who are not blessed with a fruitful enough harvest on their upper lip to make the endeavor worthwhile, and I think it’s good—courageous, even—to accept one’s own limitations and bow out. For those, however, who can sprout a full-bodied ‘stache underneath their noses, why, may I ask, wouldn’t you?

Too often, men in my friend group have treated their mustaches like a little joke, trotting them out at a party or two before losing their nerve and shaving the next day. I wish in these moments I could shake them by their (too often, nonexistent) lapels with one hand and throw their razors into the Hudson with the other. Because once the mustache has been unveiled, it’s hard to watch these men go crawling back to the safety of their baby faces.

(You may ask: What about beards? As much as I love mustaches, I for one, am staunchly anti-beard. If I wanted to kiss the pickup broom on a New York City street sweeper, I would.)

A man with a mustache is a man with a powerful sense of self. Check out these male celebrities whose mustachioed faces we’ve contrasted with their regular ones and see if you don’t agree.

He could be my daddy.

60th Annual Tony Awards - On 3 Productions Gift Suite

He could be my daddy.
Mychal Watts
He could be my dad.

WarnerMedia Winter TCA 2020 - Presentation

He could be my dad.
Emma McIntyre/Getty Images

Scruffy, tousled, just woke up like this…

"Chappie" New York Premiere

Scruffy, tousled, just woke up like this…
Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images
Coiffed, handsome, but it took him two hours.

HBO's "The Newsroom" - Season 3 Premiere

Coiffed, handsome, but it took him two hours.
Jason LaVeris

Just a little can go a long way.

The 23rd Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Arrivals

Just a little can go a long way.
Frazer Harrison/Getty Images
But none is not nearly enough.

93rd Annual Academy Awards - Arrivals

But none is not nearly enough.
Handout/Getty Images

It’s giving Bond villain.

'Mother!' UK Premiere - Red Carpet Arrivals

It’s giving Bond villain.
Samir Hussein
It's giving realtor.

Photo Call For Columbia Pictures' "Peter Rabbit"

It's giving realtor.
Emma McIntyre/Getty Images

This guy would step in and ask if the gentleman talking to me at the bar was bothering me.

FRANCE-CANNES-FILM-FESTIVAL

This guy would step in and ask if the gentleman talking to me at the bar was bothering me.
ALBERTO PIZZOLI/Getty Images
This guy is the gentleman bothering me.

Premiere Of DreamWorks Pictures And Universal Pictures' "Thank You For Your Service" - Arrivals

This guy is the gentleman bothering me.
Axelle/Bauer-Griffin

This is a man.

Premiere Of YouTube Originals' "Justin Bieber: Seasons" - Arrivals

This is a man.
Jon Kopaloff/Getty Images
In the words of Bieber himself: This is a baby, baby, baby.

Justin Bieber Visits Wonderbrett Dispensary

In the words of Bieber himself: This is a baby, baby, baby.
Emma McIntyre/Getty Images

A mustache softens Kelce’s young-jock look.

Kansas City Chiefs v New York Jets

A mustache softens Kelce’s young-jock look.
Dustin Satloff/Getty Images
When you see this photo, his old tweets start to make more sense.

This guy has a plan to get me home safe.

"Priscilla" Red Carpet - The 80th Venice International Film Festival

This guy has a plan to get me home safe.
Vittorio Zunino Celotto/Getty Images
This guy…still looks amazing, I cannot lie.

2023 GQ Men Of The Year - Arrivals

This guy…still looks amazing, I cannot lie.
Steve Granitz

This man could save me from zombies.

Los Angeles Premiere Of HBO's "The Last Of Us" - Arrivals

This man could save me from zombies.
Steve Granitz
This man would be immediately killed by them in a movie.

"Game Of Thrones" Season 4 New York Premiere

This man would be immediately killed by them in a movie.
Taylor Hill

Putting the “must” in “mustache.”

80th Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Putting the “must” in “mustache.”
Matt Winkelmeyer
Putting the “childish” in Childish Gambino.

FX Networks TCA 2016 Summer Press Tour

Putting the “childish” in Childish Gambino.
Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images

Originally Appeared on GQ