Dear Kathleen: You Should Love Your Beauty Marks
Acceptance of others begins with accepting yourself. The second chapter of See Yourself, See Each Other by Allure and Ulta Beauty, spotlights personal journeys from self-consciousness to self-acceptance. In publishing these powerful stories, Allure and Ulta Beauty continue their movement celebrating respect, empathy, and limitless beauty.
Dear Kat,
It's been over 10 years since that first mark on your upper lip appeared. I know you hate it now, but I promise one day you're going to love it. In fact, a few more will appear as you get older — for a total seven just on your face, to be exact. Some will sprout up close to that first spot, while the rest will be tucked away under your jawline. They'll look like poppy seeds sprinkled around your nose. More will come in on your arms, legs, and even your hands, so don't be afraid of them.
Eventually you'll learn what pimples and blackheads actually are and realize that's not what your spots are. You can stop scratching and trying to squeeze them. You don't have to steal your older sister's acne face wash just yet. No need to rush it — hormones will get the best of your skin eventually. Stop aggressively washing and rubbing towels against your face. It won't make the marks fade or go away. Be kind to your skin, and you'll thank yourself in the long run.
To make you feel better, here's a little spoiler: No one will make fun of you for them! Your friends might not even notice, but if they do, they won't care. Those are real friends, and they'll stick around. There will even be a handful of cute boys that will take a liking to them as you get older. (You'll quickly learn that their opinion doesn't matter, though.) Forget all those models in acne commercials perfectly splashing water on their faces. Always remember that your face is unique. No one else on this planet has it, so lighten up a little. Any pressure that you feel is coming from yourself and not outside forces.
I don't remember exactly when this happened, but eventually it'll all click. One day a few years from now, you'll be looking at Mom. I want to say this happens near the end of high school. You'll become aware of the sacrifices she's made over the years. How her smile lines have become more prominent over time. You'll start to notice when she colors her hair to hide any grays, but she still looks just as amazing as she always did. Then you'll finally see that she's also covered in spots — and they're almost almost identical to the ones you have.
It's not that you've ignored them this whole time. You've seen her almost every day for your whole life. It's that you'll finally come to the realization that her marks are another thing that makes her perfectly Mom. Just like those marks that you're covered in make you perfectly you.
Another crazy thing that'll happen is you're going to get to draw on your face. Not with markers but with beautiful powders, creams, and brushes — think of them as a new set of paints. You'll get to do it every day and even make a job out of it. So keep up with those art classes. Those will lay the foundation for your makeup skills. You'll get pretty good at it too. Eventually you'll love your marks so much that you darken them for the whole world to see. I know you might not feel it now, but you'll get there.
Love,
Originally Appeared on Allure
