Your Daily FoodScope for November 22, 2022
Do you often find yourself wondering what food to cook, how to cook it, and even that dreaded question—how much of it? It’s a daily struggle for all of us, but need not be with our food horoscope. Satisfaction is only a click away!
Aries
Thanks to the internet, thousands of up-to-date restaurant reviews are just a click away. But tastes can be subjective, and it's always best to try it yourself. You could find that the somtam at a new Thai restaurant is out of this world, despite what 'FoodSnob192' posted on Yelp.
Taurus
A closer examination can actually benefit your health. Take a look at the salad bar today. Nuts and fruits are good, but they jack up fat and sugar contents. Not to mention all those creamy dressings. Use those in moderation, and go heavier on colored veggies. Salads aren't meant to be fattening.
Gemini
The gal next door may be the source of much cooking inspiration, like her creme brulee recipe that's to die for! You appreciate her generosity and you may feel an attraction. Yet you're vexed. The hair was perfect, but the voice was deep, and you could've sworn you saw an Adam's apple.
Cancer
No one will be able to make sense of anything you say today. Frustrated by this communication breakdown, you will naturally go sulking off alone. That may be a good thing. A day at home could be a good time to cook. Your award-winning turkey chili will be something that mere words cannot describe.
Leo
You will go in search of culinary diversity today. Where better than a Swedish-style smorgasbord? It's called a koldtbord in Norway and a kolde bord in Denmark. But no matter what you call it, as long as there are rows and rows of all-you-can eat food, it'll be heaven to you.
Are you meant to be? Find out with our Love Compatibility Report!
Virgo
I think therefore I am. Huh? Therefore I am ... what? The walrus? Batman? A Philly Cheese Steak? Yo, there's an idea! It won't be street Philly, but you can make 'em at home. Grill sliced rib eye and onions over hot oil, melt Cheez Whiz, and throw it all on an Italian roll. Yo! That's friggin' great!
Libra
Your day will seem like a spiky durian fruit, the type that Jackie Chan falls into when he drops from a helicopter into a truck loaded with 'em in 'Supercop.' But don't be put off by the harsh exterior. Underneath there's a sweet and succulent fruit and it'll be worth the bloody palms to savor it.
Scorpio
You never listen. I tried to warn you about the half-price sashimi special, the one cats ran away from. But you're a risk taker! Now look at ya. Deathly pale, curled on the bathroom floor in the fetal position. Don't worry, those chills will go away, only to be followed by something much worse.
Sagittarius
Be ever mindful as you deal with people today. Embrace your paranoia and regard them with suspicion. You may see shadows in the alley, spirits in the sky. Yet all eyes will on the lone bear claw at the coffee shop. Let the jockeying begin, because a Danish just ain't gonna cut it.
Capricorn
You don't want to get a reputation as an intellectual snob. People will equate you with Frasier and Niles, not that there's anything wrong with it. So don't sneer at your friends' lack of culinary sophistication when they take you to dinner. You're at Applebees, dammit! And, no, they don't have a fine wine list.
Aquarius
What if a beam from space rendered all language useless? Man would have to learn to communicate creatively. How would you order at a restaurant? Perhaps it would be best to dress as what you might order. Lobster suits and cow outfits would be all the rage, especially if you wore lettuce as a wig.
Pisces
Why hasn't anyone melded food with poetry by opening the Poetry Slam Cafe? Your waiter would be an angry poet, and it might go something like this: 'Government is a hydra, here's your filet mignon, sir, medium rare. Society is an amoeba, and I believe you have the salmon with dill, ma'am.'
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