This Dad Won't Let His Kids Go to Sleepovers at Your House
For some, sleepovers are treasured childhood memories filled with popcorn, movie marathons, and games. But Oakville, Ontario, dad Tim Challies says for others, it can be a risky atmosphere for encountering alcohol, pornography, sex, and worst of all, abuse.
Tim and his wife, Aileen, say they know people who've experienced the latter, and that's why won't let their three kids spend the night anywhere other than a relative's house.
"We became very concerned that we didn't want our children to experience any of those things," the writer and Christian church elder explained in a Facebook video. "Not only that, we didn't want to put our children in situations where they were young and vulnerable and still too immature and still too unequipped to know how to deal with the situation."
This isn't a recent revelation for the parents. They've always had this rule for their children, now 17, 15, and 11, and they're not alone. As Tim Wrote in a viral blog post three years ago, they decided to eliminate slumber parties altogether rather than judge on a case-by-case basis so that they wouldn't get in the habit of making exceptions or be forced to explain to other parents why they permitted sleeping at some houses but not others.
"The downside is far more serious than the upside of sleepovers," Tim said. "People are realizing this is a weird tradition and there's not much of a need to do it. I wouldn't be surprised if a generation from now it's viewed as less normal."
This decision drew support from some who said they had been abused at sleepovers, as well as criticism from others saying the policy stunts children socially and fails to empower them. A few people pointed out that abuse can happen anywhere, anytime, and at the hands of trusted family members who, in the Challieses' case, would be exempt from the slumber party ban.
As Gene Beresin, M.D., a professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and , told Good Morning America, by banning sleepovers, the Challieses could be depriving their kids of more than just fun. Staying over at a friend's house can also be an opportunity to experience other cultures, have open conversations, and become more independent.
Dr. Beresin said it's a matter of determining whether or not the child can handle the experience, knowing and trusting the other parents and setting ground rules. And of course, have a way for your son or daughter to call for help if they need it.
(h/t Good Morning America)
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