A Dad Wants to Sell One Daughter's Car To Pay For the Other Daughter's Tuition & Reddit Is Absolutely Losing It

Rebecca Rakowitz
·5 min read
94

Family finances can quickly turn into family messes. (Trust us, we’ve seen it happen way more times than we’d like.) And finding a way to pay for college tuition is the bane of [nearly] every family’s existence. So we weren’t surprised to see that when one family of four on the “Am I The A—hole?” subreddit was trying to figure out how to pay their oldest’s tuition, sh*t quickly hit the fan.

The Problem

The dad who originally posted (the “OP” per Reddit lingo) said that he and his wife share two daughters — ages 21 and 17. His oldest is wrapping up her junior year of college at a “very good school” and earned a full-ride academic scholarship that is dependent on her GPA.

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Unfortunately, based on her current grades, her GPA will no longer meet the qualifications for her scholarship. They will be forced to pay the tuition for her next semester, and the one after that if she doesn’t get her grades up in time.

OP said the family “bent over backward” trying to find a solution. But no matter how hard his daughter works, her grades cannot possibly be high enough at the end of the semester to stop this from happening.

“Of course, we were upset with her for allowing this to happen, and we had a long talk with her, and she’s upset at herself too,” OP said. “But she’s a very smart kid who really struggled with her mental health from sophomore year into junior year, and it affected her grades.”

“Under no circumstance did we want her to leave college with only one year left,” he continued. “That just truly would not be fair to her after how hard she has worked.”

The Proposed Solution

So now what? Well, there might be one source of income available. You see, back in December, OP and his wife bought their 17-year-old a new Toyota RAV4 for her birthday. “This was somewhat a gift for the fact that she has also been working really hard in school and getting great grades.” The teen was “very happy” to have the car and has reportedly been driving it non-stop.

“Well, this week, her mom and I sat her down and told her that we’re very sorry but if we can’t find another solution, we have to sell her car to help cover oldest’s tuition,” OP said.

AITA if I sell my youngest daughter’s car to help cover my oldest’s tuition?
byu/Comfortable_Art_4673 inAmItheAsshole

“She became extremely upset and told us that it was unfair we were ‘rewarding’ our oldest for failing and ‘punishing’ her for succeeding, and ‘whose car would we sell if the same happened to her?'”

OP insisted he and his wife never wanted either daughter to feel that way, but that this is “just the reality of what we need to do right now.”

“If the same happened to her, we would do everything in our power to help,” he continued. “So, please tell me if I would be an a—hole for selling the car.”

Reddit’s Reaction

Redditors think this is some straight-up BS. Say what you want about the tuition cost being the actual a—hole. Or about it being OP’s money to move around how he wishes. Or about how the 17-year-old being entitled. But this is destined to blow up in his face.

“You can’t rob Peter to pay Paul,” said the top comment with 23 thousand upvotes. “If you sell that car the youngest will resent you forever.”

Yup. Privileged as she is, she will always resent her parents — and most likely her sister — for this. Plain and simple. Redditors commiserated over their own experiences getting the short end of the sibling stick, whether it be not getting the same college fund, wedding fund, etc., and said it had definitely contributed to them going “NC” (or “no contact”) with their parent(s).

And why, seemingly, does the older daughter not have to pitch in? This is her mess. Does she have a car that could be sold? Shouldn’t she have to get a job? “You should be careful, I don’t think you should even joke about that type of thing,” one Redditor said. “We know she is too good to get a job. Jobs are for younger sisters and the poors.”

“If you had the money to buy your kid a brand new RAV4, I have a hard time believing you can’t come up with the price of a single semester of tuition,” one person said. “Your being willing to spend $30K on the car — and I’m assuming you’re not a fool who spent every penny in the family savings on this present — indicates that you have assets. Do you have a home? Is a HELOC possible? A personal loan? Credit cards? Savings? Can you dip into your retirement? I’m just not buying that you have no other choice other than to repossess your daughter’s car.”

To which OP said he would rather sell his daughter’s car than put his family in any kind of long-term financial jeopardy. Which … is understandable. But if that’s the case, he should just be ready for long-term fallout.

Before you go, check out some of Reddit’s most horrifying money disaster stories.

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