I'm Still Laughing Over How Mad Customers Are At Cracker Barrel For Offering Impossible Meat

So there I was, minding my own business on the internet, when I came across this tweet about Cracker Barrel's new Impossible sausage breakfast:

It would appear that Cracker Barrel has updated their menu, offering plant-based, vegan Impossible sausage for those who don't eat pork. Hey, more options for their customers! Nobody could be mad about that, right?

A closeup of an Impossible sausage patty

WRONG! People are very mad!

One person said "Send them back to Gates, we don't eat in a old country store for woke burgers"

I checked out the Facebook post, and Cracker Barrel regulars are shocked and appalled that the restaurant would add menu items to broaden their customer base.

One person said "Are you kidding me? Who do you think your customer base is? I still order the double meat breakfast and it's not event on the menu anymore"

Something about the phrase "eating in them" really disturbs me:

One person said "Not going to happen! Cracker Barrel use to be so good, we looked forward to eating in them but not anymore"

At least this person still has Jack Daniels. Wait...whiskey is vegan too?!

A person said "I just lost respect for a once great Tennessee company"

The capitalization here makes this one read like a Fall Out Boy song title:

A person says "I used to love your store, now no way" with random words capitalized and others uncapitalized

If only Cracker Barrel had done their research:

A comment saying "Bad choice, do your research"

After the initial wave of rage, others started flocking to the thread — which now has more than 7,500 comments — to make fun of the people who are so upset about a veggie patty.

A commenter sarcastically saying "I also hate the idea of a menu having options that I specifically don't want to eat"

We demand more barrels!

Another sarcastic commenter saying "The fact you sell stuff other than crackers in barrels is why I'll never go here again"

It's truly the kind of thing that can only happen on Facebook, and for that, we curse the day its creator arrived on Earth.

Someone wonders if "Mark Zuckerburg envisioned that his little project to rate girls on the internet would turn into a forum for thousands of old people to yell at Cracker Barrel"

Cracker Barrel's social media manager (who probably had a heck of a day) responded, expressing love for their customers. Presumably, even the irate ones.

Facebook: crackerbarrel

Anyway, it seems like at least half the people on the post are having a good time:

Facebook: crackerbarrel

Here's hoping the other half will recover emotionally.

NBC