When it comes to teens, this psychologist has one major tip—no tech in the bedroom

The world we live in is ruled by technology, which can make it extra hard for parents trying to balance that fact and the American Academy of Pediatrics’ guidelines on screen time—no more than one hour a day. Let’s be realistic, it’s almost impossible to get away with basically zero screen time for your kids, especially if they go to school. And teens who are getting addicted to their phones from an early age and the potential for getting into trouble online? Forget about it. But according to Lisa Damour PhD, a psychologist, mom, and author of three New York Times best selling books, it’s all about balance and limits—not totally taking it away. She shared a tip on her Instagram about how to regulate screen time for teens and the impact it can have on their mental health and your family.

She said, “Parents often ask me, ‘if you could make just one rule when it comes to teens and technology, what would it be?’ That’s simple: No tech in the bedroom. Damour recommended not allowing technology, e.g., their phones, in their bedrooms—and certainly not overnight. She explained her three reasons why in the clip, and they just make total sense.

First, she says if they don’t have their phone or technology in their room at night, they’re going to get better sleep. “We know there’s a huge link between quality sleep and quality mental health,” she continued. Her second reason, if we only allow teenagers to use technology in the spaces that are public at home, it helps them to remember everything that happens on their phone or on their computer is ultimately something that can be public.

“I think being able to use these devices behind closed doors can sometimes make that a murky point, when we want it to be crystal clear,” Damour said.

And lastly, “Some of the most regrettable things I have seen teenagers do with their technology have been things that they do in the middle of the night, at like one in the morning, when their brakes are weak, their impulses are strong. And so not having access to technology through the night is something that can help teenagers stay on the right track, and not do something they wish they hadn’t done,” she explained.

What about strong-willed teens who are fighting for their independence and believe they can handle everything themselves? One viewer commented, “Big fan of your podcast and have implemented this rule. How do you respond to the teen’s response saying ‘I know right from wrong, why can’t you just trust me?’” Damour replied, “Your teen may be totally trustworthy—which is great! The sleep issue remains.”
Meg St. Esprit agreed with Damour’s advice and noticed a difference in her own household when setting limits for screens with her tweens.  “We used the Apple settings to shut them down at a certain time, and in the summer when I turned that off, I definitely noticed a difference in mood with my 12 year old. Will be leaving it on this summer.”