When it comes to suicide prevention, the more talking the better

Ask anyone who has lost a spouse or partner and you’ll likely hear the same story. If they’re being honest, they’ll tell you that at least once, even for a brief moment, they’ve considered ending it all.

The moment I learned my husband Colin was killed in a cycling accident, I remember wishing that a stray bolt of lightning would strike earth, hitting my son and I and preventing us from having to confront the astonishing amount of pain and grief we would feel and need work through. In those first few minutes, I didn’t think we’d be able to survive without Colin. In the moment, it seemed like the easiest option.

In a recent interview with radio personality Howard Stern, President Joe Biden recalled having similar thoughts of suicide when his wife Neilia and his 13-month-old daughter, Naomi, were killed in a car accident while out Christmas shopping in 1972. His sons Hunter and Beau were seriously injured. At the time, Biden had just been elected to the U.S. Senate.

Biden said that while he never drank, he considered taking out a bottle of Scotch and drinking it until he got drunk.

“I just thought about it; you don’t need to be crazy to commit suicide. If you’ve been to the top of the mountain, you think it’s never going to be there again,” Biden said. “I thought, “Let me just go to the Delaware Memorial (Bridge) and jump.’”

For Biden, the thoughts of suicide were short-lived. The same goes for me. However, talking about suicidal thoughts and mental health is as important as ever.

More than 49,000 people died by suicide in America in 2022, that’s one death every 11 minutes according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. In addition, 13.2 million Americans have thought about suicide, with 1.6 million attempting to end their own life.

Suicide was among the top nine leading causes of death for people ages 10-64 in 2022, and the second leading cause of death for those ages 10-14 and 20-34. And suicide rates increased more than 35 percent between 2000 and 2022.

While talking about suicide isn’t easy, being silent about the subject can have tragic results. Research shows those who feel suicidal are often ashamed, yet they likely feel a sense of relief when talking about their feelings.

So where do we go from here?

If someone you know is struggling, you can help — you can be the difference in helping them get much needed help. The 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline provides confidential support 24 hours a day, seven days a week for people in distress and offers support for loved ones. Here’s some tips on talking with and finding help for someone who may be suicidal.

— Be direct and talk openly and matter-of-factly about suicide.

— Listen and allow the person to express their feelings.

— Don’t be judgmental.

— Be available and show support.

— Don’t act shocked, as this can create distance between the two of you.

— Take action to remove means, such as weapons and drugs.

— Seek help from people or organizations specializing in suicide prevention and crisis intervention.

Finally, remember that if you or a loved one are having thoughts of suicide, help is available and you’re not alone. Call or text 988 for help 24 hours a day.

Rachel Brougham is the former assistant editor of the Petoskey News-Review. You can email her at racheldbrougham@gmail.com.

This article originally appeared on South Bend Tribune: When it comes to suicide prevention, the more talking the better.