39 Hysterical Things People Actually Posted On The Internet This Month So Far That I Never Want To Forget
We're more than halfway through ~spooky season~, but there have already been a ton of amazing jokes from Twitter this month! There's no way you'll read all of these without cackling like a witch. Enjoy!
And follow the accounts that made you laugh so your Twitter timeline will be even better!
1.
Working In Office is soooo degrading why am I biking 3 miles in slacks at 8 am with a jar of beef stew in my backpack
— manic pixie cheese curd, MPH (@tildawhirl) October 17, 2023
2.
— internet hall of fame (@InternetH0F) October 17, 2023
3.
used to work in a coffee shop in 39th and Lennox. He would come in every Wednesday on his lunch break and get the special with a hot chocolate. My manager used to be tripping cause we supposed to use water, I would always use milk and cream for him cause I thought he was sweet 👀 https://t.co/eXJkSq2CYe
— _S🦂 (@Sadeee_x) October 16, 2023
4.
— princess diana (@diamoore_) October 16, 2023
5.
having a convo w someone and “Rebecca1182839” likes your reply pic.twitter.com/zT4bqGlz5t
— ⭒ (@kmnclub) October 15, 2023
Nickelodeon / Twitter: @kmnclub
6.
My dildo came and my mom nosey ass opened my package now I have to live with my aunt pic.twitter.com/AWwHSc1WqL
— Mo (@moxxwell) October 15, 2023
Zeus / Twitter: @moxxwell
7.
lady in the gym: “i can borrow you right quick!”me: sureher: *stands me in front of her client, spins me around* “you see how his waist goes in? he’s lean”me: pic.twitter.com/r0UHI6voS5
— عالِم (@theaalimabdul) October 14, 2023
Bravo / Twitter: @theaalimabdul
8.
pic.twitter.com/WLpxHNA2hC https://t.co/7WhTm0TP1D
— wil (@wilcope4) October 13, 2023
NBC / Twitter: @wilcope4
9.
you’ve served your time? https://t.co/Zl0KL3tjvn
— hippie🤸🏾♀️ (@trulyraee) October 9, 2023
10.
This is how I feel going on a dating app pic.twitter.com/gmbFVsYycO
— Julia 🦢 (@S0UNDOFMETAL) October 9, 2023
11.
Everybody is announcing Vegas residencies it seems like nobody wants to go on tour anymore….get your ass up and come to my city pic.twitter.com/IkC2AVv94V
— 💫 (@heyjaeee) October 10, 2023
Variety / Twitter: @heyjaeee
12.
Apple featured photos always be the most emotional moments with an ex & the funnest day with a best friend you fell out with.
— Dylan Ali (@dylanali_) October 10, 2023
13.
Emailing recruiters “not interested? 👀” when I don’t hear back from a job application
— 🇵🇸 (@midosommar) October 9, 2023
14.
*Someone viewed you on Grindr* pic.twitter.com/g1RARxocQX
— Meh (@Spilling_The_T) October 8, 2023
VH1 / Twitter: @Spilling_The_T
15.
My baby made me an imaginary pizza. I started eating it saying “mmmm it’s so good.”She said, “You didn’t take it out the box” pic.twitter.com/I9pKRJd0mP
— Voldemort (@ib_2cute) October 8, 2023
Bravo / Twitter: @ib_2cute
16.
call that assault and bobbery pic.twitter.com/KORrp5kpZU
— jimmy (@jimmyoutsold) October 6, 2023
Dimension Films / Twitter: @jimmyoutsold
17.
despite the horrors there is always take edible on couch
— woahh mann (@ashhhhhhole) October 6, 2023
18.
how do I form meaningful friendships as an adult without enrolling in grad school or joining a cult
— abby govindan (@abbygov) October 6, 2023
19.
Finished the (1) roll of toilet paper in my airbnb and asked the host where I could find extra and he said the supermarket pic.twitter.com/RH9a17nj1s
— Corey Jacob (@coreytimes) October 4, 2023
Sabrina Brier / tiktok.com / Twitter: @coreytimes
20.
https://t.co/5htm6uYUBs pic.twitter.com/FaBiTJa2MU
— ThereGoTerry (@ThereGoTerry) October 12, 2023
Disney Channel / Twitter: @ThereGoTerry
21.
I yawned in the club last night and my homegirl said “don’t piss me off” 😭
— full-snack developer 🇭🇹 (@notdanilu) October 1, 2023
22.
damn. everybody getting pregnant pic.twitter.com/V8jNcpNbUN
— ❤️🔥 G A W D ❤️🔥 (@_benjvmins_) October 17, 2023
Adult Swim / Twitter: @_benjvmins_
23.
When I was getting onto my train someone pushed me (normal) and I accidentally stepped on a (Russian?) ladies foot. I apologised profusely and sat down. Would you believe that when I was getting off she trampled on both of my feet and shouted “like this you did me.”
— Ms. king (@kingeniola) October 17, 2023
24.
— cole (@juul_survivor) October 17, 2023
25.
when they go low, i go lower pic.twitter.com/hW9Z2DsliT
— omeo 𖤐 (@ihyomeo) October 16, 2023
26.
when he finishes in doggy n just has you there like: pic.twitter.com/QRcQGoRphu
— PYPER🍒 (@badbbyaera) October 12, 2023
Fox / Twitter: @badbbyaera
27.
me right after everyone just finished singing happy birthday pic.twitter.com/9P7AwNEg0t
— HEEDlE (@heyheedie) October 6, 2023
RuPaul / tiktok.com / ://Twitter: @heyheedie
28.
When my candle tells a good joke but I’m about to leave the house pic.twitter.com/q0997GMfwF
— 👻⋆ ★E *ೃ༄🎃 (@aurasobright) October 5, 2023
Twitter: @aurasobright RuPaul / tiktok.com
29.
Opening g****r and realizing I changed my display name to “⬇️” when I was dr*nk last weekend pic.twitter.com/KsQgJSkVYN
— michael (@kresnxk) October 13, 2023
Bravo / Twitter: @kresnxk
30.
Rip to Mike pic.twitter.com/RklUKqxjrm
— Katie (@dolcemite) October 15, 2023
31.
“The Cover Charge Is…Me: pic.twitter.com/w4T5J4CBcm
— KenKen (@KensBestLyfe) October 4, 2023
VH1 / Twitter: @KensBestLyfe
32.
who ordered the poopoo platter https://t.co/8LHSDWSMPy
— Brooklyn (@bklynb4by) October 15, 2023
33.
? Guess not. https://t.co/N28PgqxFV8
— ruth b8r goonsburg (@bkonyd) October 10, 2023
34.
Girls will suffer unearthly tragedies and still run errands the same day with a smile on their face but if a man’s parents divorce when he is 12 he will unleash his wrath on the world for the rest of his life
— Soup (@soupinthering) October 9, 2023
35.
no cuz having a British bf is a humbling experience i’ll be making up drama in my head and start shit and my bf will just say “what u on about” and I just am like yeah ok lemme shut up
— ✭ 𝒞 𝒦 ✭ (@wolfiecindy) October 7, 2023
36.
happy national bf day to the 6 month situationship that derailed my life but will live on in my heart forever
— samantha (@milkygoddess) October 3, 2023
37.
those paris bed bugs showing up to every fashion after pic.twitter.com/ibhdsfbedF
— ghetto drab art fag🫧 (@StormDorm411) October 3, 2023
VH1 / Twitter: @StormDorm411
38.
[gritting my teeth as a woman shows me a meme on her phone] Snoopy wouldn’t do that. That’s not real.
— reilly (@GoodPostReilly) October 3, 2023
39.
that weird feeling you get every time you look at an AI generated image is because they’re not of god btw
— jess (@abolish_jess) October 2, 2023
