Newlyweds, What Is The Most Valuable Piece Of Advice You Wish You'd Known Before Planning Your Wedding?

I'm planning a wedding right now and let me tell you, this is not for the faint of heart.

Aubrey Plaza saying "I have no plan"
Aubrey Plaza saying "I have no plan"

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I'm a woman in my thirties, so it's not like I was entirely unfamiliar with what I was getting myself into. I've been a bridesmaid, a maid of honor, and a best man, and I still wasn't prepared for the plethora of details and decisions I have faced since my turn came around.

Christine from "Selling Sunset" saying "no bitches, no buffet, no speeches"
Christine from "Selling Sunset" saying "no bitches, no buffet, no speeches"

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I've asked for advice and gotten advice I didn't ask for, and I've still found myself stumped and befuddled through this process more times than I could count.

David from Schitt's Creek saying "I know, it's a lot to process"
David from Schitt's Creek saying "I know, it's a lot to process"

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And, of course, like any semi-tech-savvy bride would, I've looked up about a billion things. I found some tips from the good folks at Reddit, like u/julia13583, who suggested to never mention it's a wedding unless it's absolutely necessary.

DeeDee feverishly typing on "Dexter's Laboratory"
DeeDee feverishly typing on "Dexter's Laboratory"

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That tip was too late, but I caught a good one early, from u/Donksmom, who suggested making a joint wedding email account to save yourself from spam and stay organized.

couple working together with paperwork and a laptop
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This one from u/DahliaMoonfire is very important as well. "Contracts are negotiable. You don't have to accept their boilerplate language."

man handing a contact and pointing to signature line

And if they are obstinate, try to get to the bottom of their concern. Once you do so, you may be able to suggest an alternative that is palatable to both sides."

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Sometimes, it's just nice to see other people who feel the way you do, like u/BAEvidattenborough, who noted, "Even for type-A's and natural planners, decision fatigue is a very real thing."

Woman stressing out while partner sleeps in bed behind her
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And also, the wise u/diyatx, who wrote, "Wedding planning is more than just planning a party...It forces you to confront whatever your 'issues' are because it's such a personal process. Whether it's your relationship with your family, your relationship with money — or in my case it's confronting trusting my intuition — letting go of people-pleasing/caring too much what others think."

Woman sitting down crying while angry woman yells and gestures at her
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It's also nice to have your suspicions confirmed, like when u/That-Farmhouse-There said, "That DIYing doesn’t always save money and adds a ton of extra stress and increased chances that things won’t go the way you want them to," while I literally had a Cricut open in another tab.

Cricut craft device is on display in a retail store, Pleasant Hill, California
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And sometimes, you'll have your whimsies justified, like when u/xXRandomPieXx, said, "If having a wedding in the summer and wearing a big ballroom gown for the ceremony, one must have a lighter dress for the dance after the dinner reception," and justified my search for a second dress.

Attractive brunette bride dances in the sun in the summer garden
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And more than a few Redditors are saving me from future pain like u/wishiwassleeping16 who urged "Stop following wedding planning accounts on IG after you’ve made a lot of your final decisions."

woman looking at her phone while leaning on her kitchen counter

They continued, "A couple of weeks leading up to our wedding I kept seeing things on IG and was getting insecure about the smallest details. The small things don’t matter at the end of the day so please remember that!"

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And also u/BourbonBitchEsq, who noted, "Last-minute expenses are real and add up. Leave at least a 5% additional margin."

The hands of a young woman hold an open wallet with the last banknote
Ksenia Valyavina / Getty Images/iStockphoto

There's comfort in knowing the inevitable, which u/notrachelgreen says is, "That SOMEONE, probably multiple people, will find a way to throw a fit about SOMETHING. I thought I was safe from that but there have been multiple meltdowns, none of them by me."

Mary Kate or Ashley Olsen fainting in "It Takes Two"
Mary Kate or Ashley Olsen fainting in "It Takes Two"

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And then there are the things I'll have to keep telling myself til the day of, like when u/ehelen reminded everyone, "The wedding itself will fly by so make sure to take time to actually enjoy it."

Happy groom piggybacking bride in vineyard during sunset
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All of this is why I'm turning to you, seasoned wedded folks, to please enlighten those of us still woefully amid the planning process with the most valuable things you learned during your wedding planning experience.

Dwight from "The Office" saying "Information is power"
Dwight from "The Office" saying "Information is power"

NBC

I will be GLUED to the comments.

man refreshing internet page aggressively
man refreshing internet page aggressively

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