Bride-to-be frustrated by mother-in-law’s ‘controlling’ wedding plans: ‘Put your foot down’

Emerald Pellot
·2 min read

A bride-to-be doesn’t want her future sister-in-law in her wedding party and is torn on what to do.

She consulted Reddit’s “Am I the A******” forum to see if it would be OK to exclude her. The bride likes her fiancé’s family but is also annoyed with some of their personalities. The issue arose when her future mother-in-law insisted her fiancé’s sister be a bridesmaid. But the bride believed that the sister-in-law’s “nagging” and disregard for boundaries would hamper her bachelorette party.

“I never planned on having her in it,” she wrote. “She is eight years older than us, always refers to us as ‘the kids’ and is always calling me sweetie and honey; as well as asking us if we have taken our dog out lately when she comes to our house and other nit-picky and honestly annoying behaviors towards me and my fiancé. […] Makes me think of her more like a second mother essentially. […] I don’t hate her or anything but I don’t want her in my wedding party.”

The mother-in-law insisted that excluding the sister would hurt her feelings.

“Part of me thinks it’s silly and I should just suck it up and put her in since I am marrying into this family,” she said. “But then another part of me pictures how annoying it will be because like her mother she is also controlling and naggy. I also picture me trying not to act too wild at my bachelorette party with my friends because my fiancé’s sister is there and I don’t want to be worried about what she thinks about me.”

Reddit users told the bride it’s her wedding, her rules.

“Put your foot down now or you have a long future of boundary stomping to look forward to,” one user commented.

“Hold firm. The sooner mother-in-law learns she can’t throw a fit and get her way, the better,” another said.

“It’s your wedding and you choose the attendants you want,” someone added.

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