Bottoms up! Here’s the aperitif that aligns with your zodiac sign

Although I’ve been a booze hound since puberty, here’s something I was today years old when I learned: An aperitif is a drink designed to stimulate the appetite.

The word aperitif is French, you can tell by the smugness and vowel count. Known in Italy as an “aperitivo,” both words trace to the Latin “aperire,” meaning “to open, or uncover.” They’re intended to open the appetite but in many cases uncover all manner of regrettable impulses and rogue nipples.

On May 16, we raise a glass to the glass on National Aperitif Day. Power Pisces, sommelier and beverage broker Shawna Allen tells The Post that an aperitif is “anything that gives you that tingle in your jaw, that’s your brain telling your body ‘I would like some food with this.’”

Erring to the dry rather than the sweet, the first mention of an aperitif comes courtesy of the 5th-century Christian ascetic and total buzz kill Diadochos of Photiki who wrote, “People who wish to discipline the sexual organs should avoid drinking those artificial concoctions which are called ‘aperitifs’ — presumably because they open a way to the stomach for the vast meal which is to follow.”

Here’s to unruly organs and catching a buzz before dinner. Read on to learn more about the classic aperitif that aligns with your zodiac sign.

ARIES (March 21 – April 19)

Negroni

Aries is ruled by Mars, the red-hot, temper-short planet of action and aggression. In kind, or war, the battle over the Negroni’s origin story is nothing short of a barroom brawl and every bit as entertaining. If you’re looking for a perfect, acrimonious accompaniment to a Negroni cocktail, saddle up to this Wikipedia talk page.

TAURUS (April 20 – May 20)

Bourbon and Blood

Taurus is represented by the horned and horny bull and when provoked, both sign and totem go for gore. Enter the Bourbon and Blood, a strong drink gussied up with a tarragon sprig, perfect for these fancy leaning people. To boot, and for the unrepentantly bougie bull, this particular recipe comes courtesy of the Ritz Carlton in Maui.

GEMINI (May 21 – June 20)

Vodka martini

This one is in honor of my martini-tipping double Gemini mother who imparted to me the poetic advice that, “Martinis are like t–s: three is two many, one is not enough, and two is just right.” True of a martini, true of the dual nature of the people of the twin.

CANCER (June 21 – July 22)

Ouzo

Cancer folks are ruled by the moody a– moon and as a result can be hard to predict and difficult to handle, much like the taste and effect of this anise-based aperitif. Black licorice forwards, ouzo has a relatively high sugar content, and the sweet taste hides a heavy hit and a sneaky hangover. Coming on sweet before leaning into punishment? A Cancer poem.

LEO (July 23 – August 22)

French 75

Ever looking for someone or something to celebrate and never afraid to be the occasion themselves, Leo is the champagne of the zodiac, a crucial component in this classic cocktail. Leo rules the heart and the silver screen and in kind, is equal parts romantic and dramatic. Fittingly, the French 75 rose to fame after a floozy ordered it in the sweeping love story/gin joint propaganda film “Casablanca.”

VIRGO (August 23 – September 22)

Pimm’s Cup

Virgos, like most Brits, are covert deviants that come across as proper, prim and more than vaguely judgmental. Enter Pimm’s, an English-born aperitif chock full of vegetal notes, complex herbal tones and floral nuances. Virgo rules the guts and a Pimm’s Cup is said to soothe them, Virgo is also known to be fantastical about their temple bodies and this cocktail is garnished with an entire salad.

LIBRA (September 23 – October 22)

Vesper

Libra is a sign that struggles to decide and can easily be convinced to tip toward excess. Enter the Vesper, which answers the drunkard’s dilemma “vodka or gin” by insisting on both. Add an effervescent lemon twist and you’ve got yourself the pre-dinner equivalent of an air sign.

SCORPIO (October 23 – November 21)

Last Word

Scorpio is a sign that would rather die than apologize and will take the last word even if they have to etch it on their gravestone. Enter this cocktail that looks like Ursula’s afterbirth and tastes bittersweet. Scorpio loves a secret, a cloak and dagger, and a trap door and this aperitif was born during Prohibition when alcohol could only be sold in private clubs.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 – December 21)

Gimlet

Sagittarius is where opportunity meets optimism, it’s the sign of making something out of nothing, a billion dollars out of a breakup, lemonade out of lemons, and a great cocktail out of a high seas disease.

History holds that the drink’s namesake, naval doctor Rear-Admiral Sir Thomas Desmond Gimlette, (Jesus Christ put that on a hand towel) suggested combining the medicinal ration of lime juice, used to prevent scurvy, alongside the allotted ration of gin to mask the taste and make the medicine go down a little easier. Seafaring and booze-slinging? What archer dreams are made of.

CAPRICORN (December 22 – January 19)

Carpano Antica Americano

Capricorn is daddy energy, it likes a club chair, a robust stock portfolio and being right. Enter Carpano Antica Formula vermouth. Well-rounded and rich, which is coincidentally what every Capricorn aspires to be, this vermouth describes itself as par excellence (eye roll) and ideal for making refined, exclusive cocktails like the Americano. Better than everyone else and reserved for the worthy? An aperitif with a superiority complex perfectly matches a sea goat.

AQUARIUS (January 20 – February 18)

Bitter Giuseppe (Cynar Manhattan)

The calling card of every Aquarius is being weird and Cynar is made with the essence of artichoke — if strange is a contest, match point. Add to it that Cynar is an abbreviation of Cynara, a mythical nymph who chose her independence over being Zeus’s concubine — a very Aquarian power play. She was later turned into an artichoke for her choice, a very Aquarian punishment. The aperitif was first hawked by Italian water bearer Ernesto Calindri using the resolutely Aquarian tagline of “Cynar, against the attrition of modern life”.

PISCES (February 19 – March 20)

Aperol Spritz

Like the average Pisces, an Aperol spritz comes across as a breezy, benign way to wile away the afternoon, perhaps under the glorious shade of a striped umbrella entertaining delusions of Capri but make no mistake, both sign and drink are a gateway drug. Five deep and you’ll wake up in an alley in Fort Lauderdale with neither shoes, shirt, nor dignity and only a receipt from a strip club ATM and a weird bruise to keep you company.

Astrologer Reda Wigle researches and irreverently reports back on planetary configurations and their effect on each zodiac sign. Her horoscopes integrate history, poetry, pop culture, and personal experience. She is also an accomplished writer who has profiled a variety of artists and performers, as well as extensively chronicled her experiences while traveling