‘My Obsession With Bodybuilding Made My Hair Fall Out’
I’ve had an unhealthy relationship with fitness my entire adult life.
I joined my first gym with my mom at age 11 and always enjoyed moving my body, but at 17, I became obsessive. I wanted to be like the thin women I saw in magazines who looked so healthy, happy, and beautiful.
Around that time, my friends were starting to diet and focus on losing weight, too. I always found myself gravitating toward whatever they thought was best, seeking external validation to soothe my insecurities. So I tried their juice cleanses and started working out excessively. I did six to seven spin classes a week and would go running on top of that. I became completely consumed with eating as little as possible and exercising as much as possible.
My life went on like this for another six years or so. I was dedicated to “clean eating,” when in reality I was binge eating and then either purging or, more commonly, exercising excessively the next day - and then fasting for three days after.
But at 24, I started dating a guy (who would later become my husband) who was a competitive bodybuilder. His friends were all dating bikini competitors, and they were so beautiful, so disciplined, so driven.
So I gave up my cardio-bunny ways and started training like a bodybuilder, hoping that doing what they did would make me happier, healthier, and more admirable.
(Courtesy of Rina Frey)"I am now the biggest I've ever been, and I’ve never been happier with my body."
