The Bachelorette Season 15, Episode 12, Recap: And Then There Were Two…

The Bachelorette finales are always filled with drama, tears, and skeptical parents—but tonight's episode (part one of two) really took the show to the next level. Let's jump right in, shall we? Spoilers ahead.

The action picks up where we left off last week: with the remaining three bros—Peter, Tyler, and Jed—so shaken by Luke's desperate reappearance they haven't fully processed there's still a rose ceremony to go. Hannah seems genuinely conflicted about all three, which I suppose makes for good TV. If I were the Bachelorette, this "journey" would have ended as soon as Tyler stepped out of the limo. The rest of the season would have been footage of us cuddling on the couch while I write Bachelor recaps. How meta.

Anyway, Jed gets the first rose. Tyler gets the second, which means Peter "The Pilot" "Windmill" Weber is out. "You're, like, the dream guy," Hannah tells him. But he's not the one. Peter takes it well—not that the bar is high, given Luke's reaction to being dumped. "You will truly always have a piece of my heart," Peter says. "This sucks, and this hurts, but I don't regret anything about it. I truly don't."

They cry and hug for what feels like hours. Eventually he leaves. "I'm not mad at Hannah," Peter says as his car pulls away. "But it hurts like a bitch right now."

We then cut to him in the studio with Chris Harrison. Peter's all teary-eyed and sniffly as he describes how much he loved Hannah. It's quite heartwarming. Even more so when Chris points out that Peter's mom is in the studio. It's a good look for a potential Bachelor candidate to have his adorable mom by his side, blowing kisses and wearing a pair of fabulous earrings.

Peter reveals he first knew he was in love with Hannah in Latvia. So why wait so long to tell her? Apparently it was tough to open up knowing other guys are dating your girlfriend. Yeah, fair enough.

When Hannah joins Peter onstage, he asks what went wrong. She insists there wasn't anything—except, oh wait, maybe he could have told her sooner he loved her. Then Peter asks why she described their relationship as a slow burn when that wasn't the case. (See windmill.) "Well, I mean, it was very passionate," she replies. The audience whoops. I catch myself hollering at the TV, "OH, WE KNOW, HANNAH." Hannah clarifies she meant the relationship was a slow burn emotionally.

"I was scared I was letting go of the perfect guy," she says of her decision not to give him a rose. "You did!" an enthusiastic audience member—Peter's mom, I hope?—shouts back. Still, Peter says he wouldn't change a thing because he stayed true to how he was feeling in the moment. He wanted their relationship to be as organic as possible, despite the circumstances.

"On a lighter note, because of you two nobody will ever look at a windmill the same," Chris chimes in. A most perfect subject change. And to this, Hannah drops a bombshell: "Since it's out there...," she says of their windmill tryst. "It was actually four times." FOUR times? In, what, less than 12 hours? I get why you might still pick Tyler over that, but Jed?

Everyone in the audience cheers and laughs, including Peter's family. "Oh my God, this is so weird," Peter says, mortified. That is the only correct response to watching your parents find out you had sex four times in a windmill on national television.

"Somewhere Luke P.'s head just exploded," Chris jokes.

With that, let's move on. Hannah's family—dad (Robert), mom (Suzanne), and a few other unnamed people—have arrived in Greece to meet Jed and Tyler. Before Tyler arrives, Hannah gives them a brief, slightly awkward rundown: Their relationship was so physical she worried she was falling in lust with him, until the fantasy suites, where his actions (or lack thereof, I guess?) made her realize that, no, this is love.

Of course, Tyler instantly charms the fam. "Tyler seems to be the real deal," Robert says. Hannah's parents tell her as much. "I think he has good intentions," Robert says. "There's so much about him I like," Suzanne gushes. Their confidence in Tyler inspires Hannah to tell him she's falling in love with him. The smile on his face at this news! My God. It's like staring into the sun, or staring at a really hot guy smiling.

The family has to meet Jed the next day, but they're skeptical. Tyler set the bar so high—how could Jed be better? (Answer: He cannot.) And Jed seems a little nervous as soon as he arrives, stumbling over his words and giving sort of rambling answers to their questions. When Robert asks Jed about his goals in life, he talks about his songwriting career (without mentioning, oh, how Hannah might fit into that). Then Robert asks Jed if he might be able to financially provide for Hannah (which, ugh, the patriarchy). Jed gives a vague answer about wanting various income streams, then mentions that he recently signed a deal to write a jingle for a dog food company. To him, that was a sign his career's on the right track.

However, it's Hannah's mom who has the best shade. When she sits down with Jed, she comments that he's been in Nashville "a while" without hitting it big. Later she tells her daughter, "He has qualities." Qualities! Not good, not bad, just qualities. I think Suzanne must be feeling very whelmed about Jed.

Ultimately, though, Suzanne says it's Hannah's decision. That said, she would pick Tyler because, I mean, she has eyes and ears. "I knew this was going to happen," Hannah complains, sounding every bit an angsty teenager being told she can't go out on a Friday night. "I'm telling you what I see as a mom," Suzanne replies. "I want to see you with somebody that will love you like you deserve to be loved."

Hannah's dad tells her that Tyler was more direct with his answers. Hannah presses her dad to be more specific, so he complains that Jed thinks "the dog food jingle" is enough to provide for Hannah. LOL. Hannah points out that she plans on being successful, so it doesn't matter whether or not Jed is the breadwinner. (Woo, Hannah!) Hannah's dad, however, insists "the man of the house still has his obligations."

Listen, Robert: You're going about this all wrong. Rather than worrying about whether or not Jed can "provide" for Hannah, you should be questioning his intentions for going on a popular dating show to talk about his music. Even his own family did that!

"I don't want you to settle for anything," Robert tells Hannah. "I want you to make the right choice. And that's as honest as I can be."

Hearing her parents' advice annoys Hannah so much that she grabs a big glass of white wine and stares out into the sea. A mood. Jed joins her and asks if she's okay. Hannah admits that Tyler's meeting with her parents went better, and it's made her confused. "You know I believe in us…but more than anything, Hannah, you know I believe in you," Jed says. "Baby, we know what we have."

Is he just citing his own song lyrics now? Scratch that, I bet he's citing someone else's song lyrics. Please tweet at me @annamoeslein if my theory is correct.

The next day Hannah has a date with Tyler. The plan is to go horseback riding again. Do the producers hate Tyler? Or is he just so perfect they had to do him dirty just to make it seem like a fair competition?

Luckily, Tyler has an easier time with this horse. They talk about their future, and Tyler says he'll be happy wherever they live as long as he's with her. The conversation continues along the same lines that night. "These feelings, I don't ever want to lose them," Tyler says. Hannah's so charmed she invites Tyler upstairs to make out on his bed.

Unfortunately, we still have one more date with Jed to get through. They're supposed to enjoy a sexy boat ride, but the waters are so rocky—foreshadowing, much?—Hannah gets seasick and nearly pukes over the side of the boat. Jed just stands there.

She recovers long enough for Jed to tell her he's feeling nervous. He says the meeting with her parents not going well has messed with his head, but it hasn't changed how he feels about her. And that night, it's more of the same: Jed is anxious, but he knows he wants to be with her. Hannah admits she's nervous too, especially about how they'll make it work while he pursues a music career. One or both of them will have to make sacrifices.

"I want more than anything to take care of you," Jed replies, adding that he's never considered "forever" with anyone else before her. Hannah questions whether it's the setting—i.e., the show—that makes him say this, but Jed insists he would have loved her no matter where or how they met.

I guess we'll find out the answer to that tomorrow night. I can't wait.

But first Hannah has a few words for us from the studio: "Since that last day in Greece, the past couple of months have been really tough and emotional," she says. "I know there are a lot of rumors out there…but I have a lot of questions that need to be answered, and I hope I'll be able to do that." Okay, now I really can't wait.

Anna Moeslein is a senior editor at Glamour. Follow her on Instagram @annamoeslein.

Originally Appeared on Glamour