Because she’s been there and done that, literally, former Bachelor contestant/tear fountain Ashley Iaconetti is recapping this season of The Bachelor for Cosmopolitan. With insider insight as well as a clear eye for what’s going down both in front of and behind the cameras, read on for her thoughts.
THIS POST CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR LAST NIGHT’S (2/5/20) EPISODE OF THE BACHELOR.
In Tuesday’s recap I said that it would be in Tammy’s best interest to drop this emotional shaming shtick if she wanted to take advantage of the rose she was given at the end of Monday’s episode. But I guess Tammy just can’t help herself, because in last night’s ep, she goes after Mykenna. Mykenna got on my nerves the first couple of episodes, but now I love the girl for full-on expressing how much she wants love and affection.
During the group date, totally out of the blue, Tammy calls Mykenna a child who lives in a fantasy land and questions her readiness for a relationship. She’s basing this on the fact that Mykenna packed her bags before the date. My opinion, or as the girls of this season like to say, “my truth,” is that Mykenna packed her stuff up because she felt like Peter wasn’t that into her. She probably felt like she was prolonging the ache in her heart by being there.
By the way: She’s allowed to change her mind.
It’s to be expected given the this highly emotional environment she’s living in in which the guy she is dating is also dating eight other girls. Like in the last episode, Tammy is getting fired up over another woman’s behavior even though the behavior doesn’t affect her relationship with Peter. She’s also claiming that the behavior is immature, even though based on what we’ve seen, Mykenna just comes across as emotionally expressive.
Apparently, in Tammy’s world, if you’re emotional, you’re not ready for a serious relationship.
I’d actually argue the opposite. If you’re emotionally closed off, you’re probably not ready for a relationship. Tammy obviously doesn’t know that tears are a turn-on for Peter. (See examples, Kelsey and Hannah Ann). I expressed in my last article just how bothered I was by Tammy and others’ emotional shaming of Kelsey. I want to reiterate: Being emotional is not a sign of weakness or instability. Crying isn’t a sign of immaturity. We all have different ways of processing our feelings and one way isn’t better than another. If you need to vent, if you need to sob, do it, and feel the relief without shame!
Of course, Mykenna and Tammy end up on a mini two-on-one together.
Mykenna delivers a melodramatic speech about finding her strength through Tammy’s ridicule. It was cheesy but also fantastic. Tammy tells Peter about her weak evidence that Mykenna isn’t there for the right reasons. She accuses Mykenna of making up hashtags for her Instagram and says that this is the reason she should be eliminated. Peter ends up believing Mykenna’s truth over Tammy’s truth, but his connection with Mykenna isn’t strong enough to take her through to the next week and she’s eliminated at the rose ceremony.
We’ve also got to talk about Victoria F.
I’m quite certain that she's not that into Peter. In my opinion, she wants to stick around because it’s fun and because the further you get the more followers, you gain. Anyone who’s gone on the show in the past several years has thought this—myself included. But in order for that mind-set to be “acceptable,” you’ve got to be falling for someone too.
I think she’s realizing she likes Peter but not enough to end up with him.
Through all the quality time he’s giving her, Peter’s demonstrating to Victoria that she’s his favorite, and I think she’s getting nervous that she’s leading him on. I think she’s starting to feel guilty about sticking around when she knows her feelings aren’t strong enough to warrant it. When I was single, I used to clam up like Victoria when an interested guy would try to get me to open up. I would only do this when I wasn’t into the guy. It’s a defense mechanism that makes guys want you even more. People always want what they can’t have.
Hannah Ann has been talked about a lot, but we really haven’t gotten to know her yet.
Her one-on-one date didn’t help much either. So much of what she said was in polished pageant-speak until Peter had to take a minute to himself. This signaled to Hannah Ann that he was possibly contemplating sending her home, and all of a sudden, the floodgates opened and she decides from here on out she’s going to be more open with him. Peter describes this moment as a breakthrough. I think Peter needs Cher to slap him and say, “Snap out of it!” I feel like Hannah Ann was crying over the thought of not getting a rose. Nothing about this scene felt genuine to me on her end.
Peter made too big of a deal over the fact that Hannah Ann has never been in love.
I feel like a lot of people haven’t been in love by the age of 23. I also don’t think that her having never been in love means that she’s not in the place in her life to find love. That’s like when entry-level jobs ask you to come in with two years of experience and you’re like, um, I’m applying for this job to get experience. I also don’t think you need to have been in love previously or even have had a serious relationship previously to enter into a relationship with your “person.”
I will conclude this week’s analysis by saying that Madison is the only person left I can see truly being a solid match for Peter. There’s an extraordinary sense of intimacy between them.
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