How to avoid turning into your parent? Just say ‘no’ to annoying behavior | Opinion

There’s little we can do to avoid turning into our parents, really; they are our role models, a guest columnist writes.
There’s little we can do to avoid turning into our parents, really; they are our role models, a guest columnist writes.

I never met my father-in-law, but I truly believe I know him.

My husband and his late father seem extremely alike, based on family discussions and a comparison of photos. The two even looked alike.

Imagine my surprise when I began to catch a view of my husband as a character in a series of television commercials about turning into your parent. Yes, it’s true, my husband is turning into his father, or someone’s dad, in so many ways.

(BTW, my husband knows how I feel about this behavior transformation. He’s read this column.)

This advertising campaign is probably familiar to many of us, especially when we compare the TV husband’s character traits to our own dad. How does this happen to someone? One can easily turn into their parent simply by acting old-fashioned and finding it difficult to become contemporary. These TV spots are hilarious, until you step back and think, hey, I know that person.

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Apparently, in my family and probably in many others, the behavior outcome is learned from the previous generation.

My husband, as an example, and his father set the pace in the family dynamic and how to enforce it. Their word was the word. Don’t ask again, even politely.

In fairness, both were great fathers and had to put up with wild and fun kids. They were devoted church-going individuals who attended services every time the doors were opened.

If something needed a repair, they fixed it or lined up a friend who knew how to do it. Or they jerry-rigged a suitable alternative.

My interest in these television spots has taken me to a new level of understanding of both my husband and fathers everywhere. I have developed an appreciation for the hard work that actor-life coach Dr. Rick and the supposed parents have accomplished to make these storylines so realistic.

The actors are spot on in portraying dads in just about any family. Their costumes are for real. Sleeveless sweaters, white undershirts, wrinkled khaki pants and fidgety mannerisms.

In my view, these TV spots are progressive. They make sense and offer sound advice.

  • Don’t introduce yourself to restaurant waiters.

  • Try not to draw attention to yourself for scoring a good parking spot at a football game. Park and move on.

  • Get familiar with the silence button on your phone. Use it.

  • Appear more confident in shopping malls. Don’t act like you’ve never been to one.

  • Don’t pull an item from the shelf and ask the clerk what they would take for it. The price is the price, unless you are thrifting or shopping a garage sale.

  • Fast food is expensive. Face it. You can’t get a hot dog for 10 cents anymore. Just accept it and don’t make a big deal about it.

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The commercials get at the core of our parents’ silly behaviors. The one where the guy proudly shows off his automobile carpet is great. Especially when we learn he doesn’t even own that car anymore.

For verification, here’s a real-life scenario starring my husband. As we pull up to a restaurant, he gets out of the car to scope it out. The place inside is dark. No visible "open" sign. He tries to pull the door handle to open the door, but it doesn’t budge. This place is locked up. Not open for business.

So, my husband ramps up his investigation, walking up and down the storefront windows cupping his hands around his eyes, looking inside in an attempt to get someone to come to the door.

There’s little we can do to avoid turning into our parents, really. They are our role models. Just grin and bear it.

Is it possible I have turned into my mom? She was dramatic, cute and always up for fun. Becoming one’s parent can’t be all that bad, I guess.

Andrea Chancellor
Andrea Chancellor

Andrea Chancellor has more than 20 years in newspaper and magazine journalism and 20 years in public relations.

This article originally appeared on Oklahoman: Parents are our role models; it makes sense we might act like them