'It was a traumatic hell ride': Bill Bailey on his worst holidays - and the cities he likes best
Ahead of his new show in London next month, the comedian shares tales and memorable moments from his travels.
It is amazing how much you learn
...about a place by performing there. Doing comedy around the world is a way of finding out how people tick. You find out about local traditions and get taken to different restaurants. It’s a richer experience.
The most remote place I’ve been
...is Svalbard. I did a show in this tiny town called Longyearbyen. We went snowmobiling around Svalbard and saw Arctic foxes, snow bunting, polar bear footprints and almost got lost in a blizzard.
I enjoy big cities
My favourite is New York as I lived there for eight months. I love Stockholm though, as you can paddle-board through the city on the sea canals. Melbourne has great eateries and you can go birdwatching.
My most treasured possession
...is a musical instrument, which I acquired in Dali City in Yunnan, called a sanxian. It has a long thin neck and three tuning pegs with a tiny little sound box. I saw a musician play it and he offered it to me. My favourite shop is Music Villa in Bozeman, Montana, which is the holy grail for guitar fans.
New Orleans is the best city on Earth
...for music. All the bars and restaurant have local musicians playing. And I always like Amsterdam. The Dutch do have a slightly odd sense of humour.
Las Vegas is overrated
As far as I can see it’s a tawdry mecca for screaming hen parties and drunken stag nights. We went there for a night, but that was all we needed.
A lost city in the middle of the jungle
I loved exploring Ciudad Perdida in the Sierra Nevada mountains of Colombia. It’s very underrated.
There is always a buzz in Hong Kong
I love the nightlife there. Before my wife and I were married, we would go out after I performed there.
The most memorable meal
It was at a little family-run place called Di Shui Dong in Shanghai. It is Hunan cuisine, just the most unique flavours I’ve ever tasted.
Nothing quite prepares you for India
I visited when I made a film about dancing bears in Agra some years ago. The drive from Delhi to Agra was terrifying. As we were barrelling along on a dual carriageway in the outside lane, the driver would slam on the brakes because an ox and cart was coming up the road in the wrong lane.
There’s a remote little island
It’s in the eastern part of Indonesia called Banda Neira. The pace of life is very slow and we stay right on the lagoon. There is a little harbour with boats coming and going. There are kingfishers too.
The best hotel I’ve ever stayed in
...is Amanjiwo, in Java, which looks out onto the Buddhist temple of Borobudur. The rooftop bar in the Caravelle Saigon is another special place for drink.
We were so lucky
...to see a blue whale in Sri Lanka. We went out on a little boat and saw dolphins, turtles, fin whales and then this leviathan rose out the water. I saw its huge eye swivel round and look at us. It was unforgettable.
I don’t mind roughing it
I am really not into spas and luxury breaks. On most trips, we aim to have one night in a hotel and go elsewhere the rest of the time.
We camped under a basic tarpaulin
...in Sumatra. It was one of my favourite holidays. We just draped it on branches and slept beneath it.
We floated down the river
...on a raft we built out of logs earlier this year when we went on holiday in Varmland in Sweden.
I love moths
...as I discovered when we were in Borneo, filming a documentary about Alfred Russel Wallace, the Victorian naturalist.
It was a traumatic hell ride
...when my family and I went to Tromso to see the Northern Lights. We went dog-sledding, but my father fell off the sled and things didn’t go to plan.
I prefer places where there are no people
...or very few. Just recently we went to Yellowstone, which was beautiful, but it was heaving with people.
Just show up and figure it out yourself
Someone once told me not to bother with a travel guide and that was actually good advice.
I’d love to see Antarctica
...as I’ve never been. I’m hoping to go to Japan in the New Year and then take a break in Indonesia.
Interview by Roz Lewis
Larks In Transit, Bill Bailey’s latest show, will be on at Wyndham’s Theatre in London from December 3 to January 5. His Limboland tour is released on DVD & available for digital download now.
