Andy Cohen proves toddler parenting isn’t for the weak in Instagram video

Toddler parenting is not unlike hostage negotiation. You have to tread carefully, take emotions into consideration, work to deactivate negative feelings, and in the end, you realize you may not have had any control over the situation after all. Case in point: Andy Cohen’s latest Instagram video, where he shows that he’s in the midst of toddler parenting hell like the rest of us.

Cohen made the ultimate error when trying to negotiate with his son Ben, 4, after he became cranky when he was forced to share his cookie with his baby sister Lucy.

“Welcome back from book tour, Daddy! #DaddyDiaries,” Cohen captioned the video.

In the clip, we can see a stressed-out and frazzled Cohen as he asks Ben if he’s crying because he’s been given a cookie (a totally normal toddler thing to do, tbh).

Related: Andy Cohen says Sarah Jessica Parker is his go-to mom friend for all of his parenting questions

“So you’re crying because I gave you a cookie? Is that why you’re crying?” Cohen asks him. “Because I ripped a little piece off for Lucy so that you would share with her? Well, I think it’s nice for you to share.”

Ah, yes, sharing. That thing you’re supposed to teach your kids how to do in order to become functional members of society. When it comes to toddlers, it’s basically like a word grenade. Ask them to share, and duck for cover.

Cohen tries to calm Ben down by striking a deal with him—maybe Lucy will share some of her cookie and eat it with his dad.

“No! Sit at Lucy’s table,” Ben cries. Because obviously his dad can’t do anything right. The sooner a toddler parent accepts this reality in all situations, the better.

Related: Confession: I don’t miss the toddler years

“I shouldn’t have given you the cookie, maybe none of these problems would’ve happened,” Cohen realized at the end.


Speaking of Cohen’s book tour, he appeared in an interview with his longtime pal Anderson Cooper on CNN to discuss being a gay parent. His book, The Daddy Diaries: The Year I Grew Up, focuses on his new life chapter as a dad.

“I’m the only gay parent at Ben’s nursery school and the only single parent,” Cohen told Cooper. He noted that he was “so grateful” for their friendship “because Ben sees Wyatt [Cooper’s son] with two dads.”