Amber Rose on Being a Former Slut-Shamer, Her ‘Middle Finger’ Fashion Sense & Getting Drunk With Amy Schumer

Amber Rose. Photo: Getty Images

Amber Rose has been a pop culture curiosity ever since she paraded onto the scene as Kanye West’s girlfriend back in 2008. Though their relationship ended after two high profile years, the rapper, model, and new mom (she has a son with ex-husband Wiz Khalifa) has continued to make waves whether she’s wearing risqué outfits, engaging in Twitter feuds with the Kardashians, or organizing the Slut Walk as she did this past October. Her latest endeavor is as a pseudo self-help author of the book, How to Be a Bad Bitch, which encourages women to learn from her trials and tribulations. Here she gets candid about fame, family, and being a reformed slut-shamer.

Yahoo Style: How has the reception been to your new book, How to Be a Bad Bitch?

Amber Rose: It’s been really wonderful. It was really word of mouth helped it get as far as it is now. I feel like people judged it by the cover and the title, but it really grew. I’m really happy.

How challenging was it to relive your past mistakes when writing this book?

I just wanted to help women more than anything. That’s kind of what made it easy, and just talking about the things that I’ve been through was therapeutic. But I kind of just look back and laugh at those times really because I’m not the same person anymore.

What are some of the biggest lessons that you’ve learned?

Oh my God, there are so many. I guess the biggest one would be that I was a former slut shamer. Even though I was a dancer — which is like really weird looking back on that time — I was judging women for how they dressed or I would insinuate that a girl was a ‘ho’ just because she was just beautiful and demanded attention. I was around a lot of women like that when I was younger, and that was really just me being insecure with myself. It was just me being a hater. And I feel like a lot of women are still like that, and I’m glad I am at a point in my life where I’m like not like that anymore.

Looking back, is there anything you would do differently if you could do it all over again?

I wouldn’t because everything is a learning experience. I do feel like I had angels around me at all times because I did put myself in a lot of messed up situations, but I came out of them – like God was just always on my side.

Are you raising your son to specifically avoid some of those things?

Absolutely. I think we all do as parents. The cool thing about my child is that he’s not going to grow up in the hood of south Philly. And he’s not going to grow up poor, and he’s not going to hang out on corners. It’s just a different life when you grow up in a city. My son was born in Beverly Hills. He’s going to grow up in California. He’s going to have a very different life, and I’m happy for that. I just want him to be humble, and respect people, especially women, and be a good person. And he’s on his way. He’s a really good kid.

What are your tactics for surviving fame?

I know people that are extremely famous, that they look like they have it all together in public, and they really cannot handle it. It really takes a toll on them. I’m an open book, so there’s really nothing you can say about me that I haven’t already said about myself. And that is freedom. I don’t have any skeletons. So when you don’t have skeletons, you kind of stop giving a f–k what anyone has to say because it really doesn’t matter. I’ve told my truth. You know where I come from. You know where I’ve been, who I’ve dated. You know my son. You know who I was married to. I mean, there’s really nothing for me to hide, and I feel like a lot of people have a lot of skeletons. And they sit in fear about what the media could possibly say. But I just don’t give a f–k. I don’t really care.

What’s the number one stereotype that people give you that you’d like to change?

I like to break people’s balls, that’s fun for me. So when I wear a fishnet dress, I do that on purpose because that’s like a middle finger to everybody. It’s like, I’m a mom, I’m a businesswoman, I’m super smart, I’ve traveled. I know exactly what I’m talking about and I don’t care what you have to say. So I’m going to do certain things like that just because I can and it makes me happy.

Is it hard to date when you’re famous, and do you always question motives?

Uh, yeah, hell, yeah! I would say that a lot of guys don’t try talk to me because they’re intimidated. And I’m not opposed to reaching out to guys, but there has to be an initial chemistry. But I do feel like a lot of men love a completely submissive woman. They like to be one hundred percent in control. And that’s not who I am. I’m not a 9 to 5 secretary. I probably won’t cook you dinner every night. When I can, I will. If not I’m like, I’m busy, and I have shit to do. I’ll cook for my son, but other than that, it’s just not a priority for me right now. I’m not really looking for a relationship or a guy.

The cover of How to Be a Bad Bitch. Photo: Amazon

Is it easier for you to date people that are also in the spotlight because they know what your life is like?

Absolutely. And that’s where all the judgmental people come out because they’re like, Oh, well, she only dates other famous people. It’s like, granted, yes, that’s true, but I have dated regular guys too. And they’re just like, ‘Oh, hell, no. I could not deal with this shit.’ They’ll ask, ‘Why can’t I post you on my Instagram?’ And I have to tell them, ‘Yo, you don’t understand my life. We just went on like three dates. No, you cannot post me on Instagram. I’m not a regular girl. I don’t live like that.’ And then if they want to go to a certain restaurant it’s like, ‘Well, why can’t we go here?’ And it’s because I don’t want to be mobbed by paparazzi, and that’s a restaurant where paparazzi just, like, stays at. I don’t put myself in situations like that. So I do like to date other people that understand my life a lot more. It makes it much easier.

That would be hard, being bombarded by the paparazzi after two dates.

Exactly. And then, the list just builds up and people are like, Well, she was with this guy and that guy and this guy and that guy and that guy. And it’s just like, Whoa, I’m single. I guess I went out on a couple dates, but goddamn, can I live? So it does become very irritating.

What feedback have you gotten from fans and critics after Slut Walk?

Slut Walk was just a safe place for women to come and dress how they wanted to dress, dance how they wanted to dance. No one was there to judge. Everyone was in the same boat. We all had similar stories. Whether it was rape, sexual assault, double standards, victim blaming, we all lived it. Now girls will literally ask me three times a day if it’s happening again.

You talk about mastering the art of seduction, any tips to share?

I mean, I pride myself on being really nice to every single person. That’s most important. Be super nice to everyone because you never know when you’ll need someone. I could have faded away quite a few years ago, but I’m still here because I made great connections with wonderful people. I’ve always been a nice person, so no one ever wanted to see me be down and out.

You also talk about never sending nude photos to a guy. Are there any times when there’s an exception, like you’re committed or married?

Hell, no! Nothing lasts forever, and a guy’s nude picture is not as scandalous as a woman’s nude picture. By all means, if you want to put your own nude pictures out, more power to you, but if you know that your family is going to see it, and you’re going to be devastated and it’s going to be a whole moment, do not do it. Years ago, I sent nude pictures to my ex-boyfriend and they got leaked to the entire Internet and it was really devastating.

Something that is not devastating is your new friendship with Amy Schumer. What do you love most about paling around with her?

I love Amy because she’s brutally honest. She’s super funny, but she also has a really compassionate heart. You can have a deep conversation with her and she’ll give you the best advice. She’s all about girl power, which I love. And literally, I can call her, and she’s like, ‘Yo, I’m in the Hamptons. Just come out here.’ And I’m like, F–k you. And she’ll say, ‘Just get a flight. Come out here. Come and stay in the house with me. Let’s have a slumber party.’ She’s just that girl who is fun all the time.

What goes on during a slumber party with Amy Schumer?

A lot of drinks [laughs]. A lot of alcohol and a lot of laughs, for sure.

Does having a son inspire you to tone it down in certain situations?

Yeah. I mean, I think what people don’t understand is that he’s my son, so regardless if I was a crack head or a prostitute or whatever, my son is always going to love me. He is never going to look at me differently. Am I going to embarrass him and wear a tiny skirt and pick him up from grade school? Probably not. I know what’s appropriate and what’s not. But I’m going to continue to be me. I’m never going to like deliberately do things to embarrass my child.

Do you Google yourself or stay away from reading stuff about you?

Hell, no! I do not Google myself. I do not look at my own interviews. I don’t look at myself on TV. I just don’t. I never watch myself. Once I say something, and it’s out there, it’s done. It’s over with. That’s it.

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