Honestly, we should all bow down to Hailey Baldwin. She's been crushing on Justin Bieber since he was singing "One Time," and now, she's Mrs. Bieber. So, how did she turn a crush into the real thing? Here's everything you need to know to get your crush to like you back.
1. Put yourself out there.
I know it can be super scary, but sometimes you just have to make the first move. You can't expect your crush to read your mind and figure out on their own that you're majorly crushing. Ask them on a study date, go out of your way to talk to them, invite them over for a movie marathon. Once they see you're interested, they may just return the feelings, and everything will fall in to place. Don't wait around for years for your crush to look your way, make things happen!
2. Make subtle gestures.
Even the most discreet expression can grab your crush’s attention. Compliment their outfit, or smile and say hi when you pass them in the hall. After school, keep things flirty over text. It could be as simple as asking a question, sending a silly joke or meme, or congratulating them on a recent win if they play sports.
3. Spend time with them — but don’t go overboard!
It might sound pretty obvious but try to be around your crush as much as possible, without coming off too strong. Sit next to them at lunch, ask them to be your gym partner, or even suggest hanging out over the weekend. The one-on-one time will give you two the chance to bond and connect, opening up the possibility of a mutual attraction.
I get it, talking about yourself is so fun, but your crush probably doesn't care about the time when your BFF fell in front of everyone at the mall (even though it was hilarious). While you should, of course, share info about yourself, make sure you're also listening to your crush (not on your phone while they tell you about their siblings). Ask questions, remain engaged, and take note of what they say. Your crush will really appreciate it when you send them a text wishing them luck on the test they casually mentioned a few days before.
5. Find out what your crush is passionate about.
If you want to ~really~ get to know someone, find out what they care about. If you see your crush is volunteering at Planned Parenthood, ask them what draws them to the organization, or maybe see if you can volunteer together. Jean Smith, a social psychologist says, “If you get someone to talk about something they like, it’s going to put that person in a good mood, and you become part of the good vibes.”
Personally, there is nothing that makes me more attracted to my crush than seeing them light up over a cause or hobby that they’re truly passionate about. Asking questions about what is important to them will not only make you feel closer to them, but will also help you understand what type of person they are.
6. Make eye contact.
Nothing is worse than being on a date and having weak eye-contact. Seriously! My advice? If you like someone and are sitting across the table from them, keep eye contact throughout your entire conversation. You don’t have to stare at them while they’re shoving food in their mouth, but avoid looking down when you’re talking or looking around the room or at your phone. If you look away from them, it’ll make you seem uninterested or signal to your crush that you’d rather be anywhere else. No one wants that! Besides, eye-contact will also make you appear more confident, which will only make you appear more attractive to them.
7. Buy your crush a hot drink.
Okay, tbh I’ve never tried this, BUT according to a recent study at Yale University, when someone is holding a warm drink they are more likely to view whomever they are talking to…aka YOU…. as having a personality they’re attracted to. And science is never wrong, so you may as well try it out! Now I have even more of a reason to go on a PSL date with my crush tn.
8. Don’t be afraid to confess your feelings.
I know that it seems “cool” to play the game, and I’ve definitely had my fair share of moments when playing the game has been effective to helping me get closer to my crush. But, tbh when I look back at my past four relationships, none of them have begun after playing hard to get. Instead, they’ve manifested into meaningful relationship after one of us was honest about our feelings for each other. I know this takes bravery, but if I’ve done it FOUR times in my life (and never regretted it once), you can do it too.
9. Seriously — don’t play mind games.
It’s not worth anyone’s time, and one (or both) of you could get hurt. Waiting hours — or days — to text back, consistently trying to make them jealous, or ignoring them could just drive this person away. Mind games seriously complicate matters, and navigating a crush is already difficult enough! It’s important to be honest about your feelings, especially with yourself.
10. Be yourself!
In my opinion, one of the worst mistakes you can make while flirting is pretending to be someone you’re not actually IRL. Here’s the thing, if you’re pretending to be someone you think your crush will like, then you’re doomed if they start to like this version of you because it’s not you! Seriously. From the second you start hanging out with your crush to when you ~eventually maybe become official~, be yourself because you want your crush to like YOU, not a version of you.
11. Show off your personal style.
It’s so important to be yourself when getting to know someone, and that translates directly over to how you dress. Don’t just throw an outfit on because you think they’ll like it, or because everyone else is wearing it. Dress for yourself! Your style could even be a conversation starter, especially if you love rocking your favorite band tees.
12. Put your phone down in front of them!
This should go without saying, but put down your phone when you’re with your crush. Your time is precious with them, and you’re obviously going to text your BFF everything afterwards anyway. So, the YouTube makeup tutorials and group chats can wait… Be present with your crush. Ask them questions. Tell them about yourself, your favorite books, and your dreams. Don’t be distracted. Give them your full undivided attention. They’re your crush after all. They deserve it.
13. Talk to your friends about them.
This will help give you perspective on your ~crush situation~. Tell your besties about what you talk about together, what they text you, and then re-evaluate the whole thing. Friends can be really helpful in giving you perspective on the whole situation, since when you’re crushing on someone it’s hard to see things objectively. Maybe they like you more than you thought! Or maybe, you don’t like them as much as you initially thought when you first laid eyes on them in volleyball practice.
14. Don’t talk about your old crushes.
No matter what happens. You should never talk about old baes, crushes, flings, dates, or breakups with your new crush. How would you feel if you if your crush spoke about their old crushes and baes? Plus, that’s the quickest way to ‘friend-zone’ anyone in your life. Besides, taking about old romances are what group chats are for!
15. Don’t force conversations.
While it’s great to be open and vulnerable with your crush, you don’t want to overshare or push them too much. The get-to-know-you stage is one of the most exciting of any new relationship, and there’s no point in rushing through that. Yes, word vomit can be very real — but try to let some subjects come up naturally in conversation.
16. Vocalize what you appreciate about them.
Try to be genuine about this. Is it the way they walk into math class and almost always sit next to you? Is it the ideas they contribute in English class? A sport they excel at? The way their hair falls? What is it about them that bombards your thoughts? What makes them special? This is sometimes harder to pinpoint than you think, but once you do figure out what exactly it is, don’t be afraid to tell them. Everyone loves hearing compliments, and I’m sure your crush would be nothing but honored to receive an earnest compliment from someone as amazing as you.
17. Never forget your self-worth.
Just because you have a totally consuming crush, doesn’t mean you’re any less strong emotionally. Remind yourself of this before your first date, and, hopefully, as you eventually become closer with your crush. There is so much to like about you…. How would anyone not crush on you?
Now, you got this. Go be confident. Be self-assured. Put your phone down and go speak with your crush about their weekend plans. If I can do it, you can too!
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