‘90 Day Fiancé: Happily Ever After’: The Family Chantel Has Finally Lost It

From Cosmopolitan

Over at 90 Day Fiancé: Happily Ever After, it was a fairly tame week. Well, except for some major dramz from the Family Chantel, who is gearing up for their spin-off beautifully. River is in the background doing jumping jacks, preparing for his next Pedro beatdown.

So it all stars when Pedro tells Chantel he doesn't want to go to Thanksgiving dinner at her parent's house. Chantel gets mad at Pedro - even though he's clearly suuuuper uncomfortable seeing as her family hates him.

IMHO, Chantel needs to stand up to her family and be like, "Listen, I was the one who told Pedro to lie to you in the first place! I'm the asshole! Either be nice to my husband or else we're not chilling anymore, mom and dad and River and Winter and Winter's new boyfriend who just showed up because he wants his 15 seconds!" but whatever. That would be a boring TV show and nobody would watch. TLC's writers producers obviously know better than I do. Plus, I'm not in the family Chantel and I don't know all the dynamics and also, I'm not trying to make sure TLC gives me my own show. (The Family Chantel is set to premiere later this year! You do the math!) (Because I can't; it's hella complicated.)

So. It all starts with Pedro really trying to get out of going to Thanksgiving. Chantel says something about how holidays are for family, and Pedro says he doesn't feel like he's part of her family. Which, fair. She's a brat about it and then leaves without him. (Good job, Pedro!)

When Chantel arrives at the party, everyone is simply aghast that Pedro isn't with her. I'm sorry, but the last time Pedro was there, he and River got into fisticuffs and now they're pretending to be shocked that Pedro doesn't want to hang with them?! OK, sure.

The Family Chantel then spend the entire dinner talking about how Pedro might be taking steroids. The grown adult children proceed to call their parents "mommy" and "daddy." Nobody even talks to Winter's boyfriend. It's a mess.

And then! The Mother Chantel introduces her taser, which she named "Shocky." She calls it a, "new form of vitamin D that's not found in milk," which sounds vaguely sexual, right? It's bothersome.

Then Chantel spends the entire dinner apologizing for Pedro! No wonder he wonder he wants to move back to the Dominican Republic! Chantel and Family Chantel are WILD.

Over on Twitter, some people seem to think the Family Chantel is manipulating Chantel:

But others are, like, "Chantel, friend, you HAVE to stand up for your man!" Plus, lots of folks think she brought this on her own damn self because of lying to her family in the first place.

It seems like most people are on Pedro's side:

Oh well, seems like this marriage is very healthy and this isn't a stunt from TLC to get us hooked for The Family Chantel spin-off! I mean, even if it ends with River and Pedro killing each other, it'll be worth it for the ratings, right?!

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