One of the most pleasing parts of the holiday season is gifting; the other is creating a cocoon under a layer of blankets and inhaling seasonally appropriate rom-coms. Every year, we feast on the Christmas-, Hanukkah-, and Chrismukkah-themed content that broadcast networks have to offer. In celebration of this pop culture tradition, we’ve ranked our favorite holiday presents from TV and film; let this list inspire your shopping, and binge-watching, this December.
9. The carton of cigarettes Bender gets from his dad in The Breakfast Club
“Hey, smoke up, Johnny,” disaffected weirdo Bender’s dad supposedly tells him on Christmas. Not exactly holly-jolly.
8. The pink bunny suit from A Christmas Story
Yikes. Doesn’t Aunt Clara know that all Ralphie wants for Christmas is a Red Ryder air rifle? Instead, she sticks him with this bright pink monstrosity when she could at least have gone with a more Christmasy pattern.
7. The Love Actually Joni Mitchell CD
At least Alan Rickman’s character actually thought about his wife’s musical taste; she refers to Joni Mitchell early in the movie as “the woman who taught your cold English wife how to feel.” The question lingers, though; if she’s such a Mitchell superfan, wouldn’t she already own Both Sides Now on CD? (I’ve thought about this every day for 26 years.)
6. The Love Actually necklace
Right idea, wrong recipient. Buy an expensive gift for your long-suffering wife, Emma Thompson, instead of the office temptress you keep flirting with, in what has all the makings of a sexual harassment suit, Alan Rickman!
5. The “Seth Cohen starter pack” that Seth gives Anna for Chrismukkah in season one of The O.C.
The thought is charmingly original, I guess (or it was, before starter pack memes), but a guy giving me a gift-wrapped set of his interests sounds like my literal, screaming nightmare. Yes, I had a crush on charmingly nebbish Seth Cohen in 2004, as did we all, but this gift simply does not hold up for me.
4. The necklace Don Draper gives his daughter Sally on season four of Mad Men
Is it great that hard-drinking playboy Don dispatched his assistant to buy his kids’ Christmas gifts (and then eventually slept with that assistant)? No, not really, but at least the necklace—which is engraved with Sally’s initials—sounds nice.
3. The new diary that Mark Darcy buys for Bridget Jones
Bridget’s initially standoffish lawyer crush, Mark Darcy, is ultimately the one, because he supports her writing and loves her just as she is, you guys. (Yes, he technically gives her this gift on New Year’s Eve, but they hadn’t seen each other at Christmas, so it still counts.)
2. The townspeople’s donation of $8,000 in It’s a Wonderful Life
Who among us does not shed a tear when the town rallies to come up with George and Uncle Billy’s missing money? It’s like you tell your family year after year when they ask what to get you for Christmas: Cash is always preferred.
1. The “really expensive white-gold hoops” Gretchen Wieners’s parents got her for Hanukkah in Mean Girls
Are Gretchen’s hoops technically Christmas presents? No, but as a Jewish American Princess myself, I’m comfortable including them on this list. She had to pretend like she didn’t even like them! It was so sad!
Originally Appeared on Vogue