73 Best Quotes By Alexis Rose From "Schitt's Creek"

Alexis Rose from Schitt's Creek transitioned from spoiled rich brat to girl boss in a span of six seasons. Whether you are the rich brat, the girl boss or somewhere in between you can always win by quoting this icon's words. Here are 73 examples.

1."Nom nom for us, David."

2."I’m sorry for not responding to, like, one text, David!"

3."Love that journey for me."

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4."My life is an inconvenience."

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5."I don’t skate through life. I walk through life… in really nice shoes.

6."OK, yeah, no, I did not write this… OK, like, I didn’t even choose this font! It’s horrible."

Alexis talking to David
CBC

7."I am going to slap you in the face."

8."Ew, David!"

9."People aren’t thinking about you the way that you’re thinking about you."

10."I’m the one who should be at a sketchy bar meeting randoms. I’m the one who should go missing."

11."I once passed off a mini horse and three guinea pigs as service animals, so anything is possible."

12."What’s your favorite season?"

Alexis looking at David
CBC

13."Every now and again, spending like a little bit of money on something really special…it might not buy you happiness, but it can definitely help make you smile."

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14."I went on a blind date to Bali with Leo, so I’m pretty sure it’ll be fine."

Alexis and David talking to Moira
CBC

15."This is a moment of growth for you."

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16."I didn't do missing, David. The FBI knew where I was the entire time."

17."There is nothing wrong with asking for what you deserve."

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18."So this is weird. Today marks the longest relationship I’ve ever voluntarily had with someone. Yeah, the actual longest relationship was a three-month affair with a Saudi prince, but for the last two months of that I was trapped in his palace trying to get to an embassy."

Alexis pointing to her phone and being angry
CBC

19."It's like a witch's house in here, David."

20."I’m a Lamborghini, I’m a Hollywood star."

21."So as Jocelyn said, my name is Alexis, and yes, I did not finish high school. Um, it’s this long, boring story involving a yacht, and a famous soccer player, and like a ton of mushrooms.

22."I think it would be so great if we could just go around the room, and everyone could tell me like five things about yourself."

Alexis sitting in front of a mirror
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23."I used to text Zac Efron just, like, for a booty call. Poor thing would be pressing the buzzer before I even hit send."

Alexis and David acting very uninterested
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24."He's afraid of moths and butterflies and businesswomen in sneakers."

25."Yeah, and Adam Levine and I *just* went for bubble tea."

Alexis after a run
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26."One time I did do a book report on David's diary, and it was very dark."

27."I don’t think that’s the right journey for you at this point in time."

28."I'm expensive sushi. I'm a cute, huge yacht."

29."It’s a list of BuzzFeed’s most motivational quotes for girl bosses under thirty."

30."I don’t know why you didn’t ask me first, David. I have my license in seven different countries and I have my 'F' class."

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31."Boop."

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32."I wasn’t in rehab; I was at rehab, visiting Stavros."

Alexis sitting
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33."I would like to remind you that I don't have a therapist anymore."

34."I am embarrassed for you."

Alexis lying in bed
CBC

35."Lick rust."

36."Just remember: no sudden movements, do not reach for the glove box, and no matter what happens, do not tell them your real name."

Alexis stretching and David talking
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37."We've both had a lot of Zhampagne, just feel like we need to hydrate and reflect."

38."If there’s one thing I’ve learned, when it comes to love, you can’t let the little things get in your way."

Alexis working out
CBC

39."I'm sorry." Were you picked up by the South Korean Secret Police on New Year's?"

40."I don’t want to brag, but Us Weekly once described me as ‘up for anything'."

41."Did you know you can still get mail?"

Mutt and Alexis running in the rain
CBC

42."Yeah, no. I know composting. Gwyneth Paltrow does a compost gift exchange."

Alexis smiling
CBC

43."Tell that to me at 21, escaping the Yakuza."

Alexis drying her hair
CBC

44."I still actually had a few more verses. And in the last verse, I really get to showcase my range."

Alexis talking to David
CBC

45."Stop doing that with your face."

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46."You are being so extra right now."

Alexis talking to Mutt
CBC

47."You get murdered first for once."

48."I miss being surrounded by loose acquaintances who think I’m funny and smart and charming"

Alexis talking to Ted
CBC

49."I am sorry if I am going through something right now."

50."Your vibe can be a bit intense."

51."Turkish Cosmo once included my photo on their list of the world's best sarongs."

52."I totally get that."

David and Alexis sitting around a table
CBC

53."David, you'd better be talking about Stevie Nicks."

54."Generally speaking, this is like a very cute look for me."

55."I told myself I would enjoy my own company tonight."

56."I was one of the original Pussycat Dolls, but it only lasted like two weeks because apparently, I’m too pretty."

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57."I’m pretty sure I’m engaged, and I’m pretty sure I just cheated on my fiancé."

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58."Every time I did that with a boyfriend, I’d send him off with someone who like wasn’t a threat. Like, Pippa Middleton or Rihanna."

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59."I actually got this in a swap with Sienna Miller. And by that, I mean it fell off her wrist at a Halloween party and I kept it."

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60."Hide your diamonds, hide your exes…I’m a little bit Alexis."

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61."People love extreme vanity, and they love puppies!"

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62."What now? Do I leave everything behind and move to some random island to be with the love of my life? Because I did that with Harry Styles in England, and it was, like, too rainy."

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63."Sometimes, a special little lock can come along, that you didn’t think would fit because it didn’t look, or act, like the lock you thought you needed."

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64."He didn’t dump me. We actually both decided it was best that he see other people."

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65."Like, I think I’m wearing a wedding dress."

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66."I’ve been travelling the world since I was a teen model, but something about this feels different."

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67."Do I have to remind you of the time that I was taken hostage on David Geffen’s yacht by Somali pirates for a week and nobody answered my texts?"

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68."This is all feeling very sketchy."

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69."It's called an immersive experience."

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70."I am little bit Alexis."

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71."You are being so extra right now."

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72."I don't get it, but whatever."

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73."Well, I won't be doing any of that, but thank you."

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