Think Someone You Know is a Sociopath? The Signs to Look For.
SOCIOPATHS ARE COMMONLY depicted as villains in movies, books, and TV. But they can exist in real life, too.
When you meet a true sociopath, you’ll quickly realize that things don’t quite add up. On one hand, they seem charming and charismatic, but lurking under the surface is someone who’s actually deceptive, exploitative, and manipulative. That’s why it’s crucial to know the signs of a sociopath.
“A sociopath is an individual who enjoys taking risks for personal thrill or gain, disregards societal rules or the feelings of other people, and lacks remorse for their harmful actions,” says Vanessa Kennedy, Ph.D., director of psychology at Driftwood Recovery. At first, they may charm you, but “they lack genuine loyalty to others due to a deep-seated need for survival often rooted in a traumatic upbringing,” she says.
Although people toss around the term sociopath, many individuals that exude these behaviors actually have antisocial personality disorder, which is sometimes referred to as sociopathy, says Pavel Blagov, Ph.D., associate professor of psychology at Whitman College. Antisocial personality disorder is a mental health condition where someone continuously manipulates, exploits, or violates the rights of other people without remorse, according to MedlinePlus.
No one knows what causes the disorder, but some experts theorize that genetics or factors like child abuse may contribute. People that we consider "sociopaths" and are diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder must have a long-standing history of aggression or rule-breaking, meaning this behavior doesn't just come out of nowhere, says Jeffrey Cohen, Psy.D., assistant professor of medical psychology at Columbia University. He says estimates show only up to about 3 percent of the population have the disorder.
To be diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder, Kennedy says someone must show evidence of a conduct disorder before age 15 and express symptoms like aggression, cruelty to people or animals, lying, property destruction, or violating rules or the law.
Still, people can display antisocial—or sociopathic—behaviors without necessarily meeting the criteria of a personality disorder. “Human beings are complex and can fall somewhere on a spectrum of sociopathic behavior, at times manipulating others for personal gain, demonstrating aggression, or lying, but perhaps only doing these behaviors in a specific context or certain relationships,” Kennedy explains. For instance, an executive might lie, manipulate, or behave aggressively to land a high-stakes deal, but at home is a loyal, responsible partner and parent.
Antisocial personality disorder can only be diagnosed by a mental health professional. But, if you think you might know a sociopath, here are some common signs to look out for.
Sign of Sociopath: Egocentric
Everyone is a bit egocentric, but people with the disorder take it to another level. “They look out for their own needs first, [and] that would come before the needs of family or children or friends," says Blagov.
The individuals are selfish and self-serving and use subtle or frank manipulation to get their way, says Alex Dimitriu, M.D., a double-board certified physician in psychiatry and sleep medicine and founder of Menlo Park Psychiatry & Sleep Medicine and BrainfoodMD. “They’re antisocial because they don’t care about society or others, they care about themselves only. While most of us have been selfish at some point in our lives, in antisocial personality disorder, this is the rule, not the exception.”
Sign of Sociopath: Callous
Most people fall along an “anxiety spectrum,” Dr. Dimitriu says, where some care too much and may have anxiety. People with antisocial personality disorder care too little, but there’s an added element of disregarding the impact of their behaviors on others. The callousness of this behavior can range from being verbally mean to physically violent, says Blagov. Not all people exhibit callous behavior in the same way.
Sign of Sociopath: Manipulative
Blagov explains that these types often lie and use people—sometimes to get out of trouble. "This is a self-protective type of lying and manipulation," says Blagov. Other times they manipulate because they enjoy having power over another person, he says.
Sign of Sociopath: Lack of empathy
People with antisocial personality disorder don't feel empathy for other people, Cohen says. Understandably, this makes it difficult to maintain relationships or friendships and many sociopaths tend to be loners. They tend to view people as objects to be used for personal gain or to be avoided. Kennedy says this often makes these individuals prone to social isolation, depression, and health problems. "They may burn bridges with others and have few avenues for genuine social support," she says.
Sign of Sociopath: Impulsive
People with antisocial personality disorder tend to take risks without any forethought, Kennedy says, "They may make rash decisions that don’t take consequences into account and struggle with showing up consistently for others." The result: they get fired a lot, lack financial stability, and might engage in criminal activity.
According to Blagov, people with the disorder are sensation seekers who are prone to boredom. This may be one reason that they are more likely to participate in dangerous behaviors or steal.
Sign of Sociopath: Fearless
Getting caught prevents most people from engaging in criminal activity like shoplifting, but those with antisocial personality disorder have weak fear and anxiety responses, says Blagov. "There isn’t a stopping mechanism."
Sign of Sociopath: Disrespect for Others
One central sign of antisocial behavior is a general disrespect for others, including their body, feelings, personal boundaries, and belongings, says Meghan Marcum, PsyD, chief psychologist at AMFM Healthcare. They’re also aggressive, deceptive, and not willing to accept responsibility for any mistakes, so abusive or bad relationships are common.
Sign of Sociopath: Angers Easily
Anger and aggression are chief traits of antisocial personality disorder. People may also display hostility or even violence. "They often experience irritability and exhibit aggression or resort to intimidating or bullying behavior when someone sees through their facade," Kennedy says. They might get angry easily and quickly if too many demands are placed on them in relationships, too.
Sign of Sociopath: No remorse
Someone considered a sociopath may act aggressively, disrespectfully, or violently, but have no remorse or take any accountability for their actions. "Typically, a person can reflect on hurting someone they care about, feel guilt and empathy, and take at least some responsibility for their actions," Kennedy says.
Not so with sociopaths. They’re more likely to show indifference toward someone else’s emotions and even blame them for being too weak or sensitive, she adds, "They may even show a sense of being justified in hurting someone else who they think deserved it."
Sign of Sociopath: Lying
Persistent lying or deceit are classic characteristics of antisocial personality disorder, Kennedy says. Someone may lie to charm, outwit, or manipulate someone for personal gain or just because they enjoy it. They also might display personality traits like arrogance, a sense of superiority, or being opinionated, with the goal of deceiving or manipulating others.
How can a sociopath be treated?
Antisocial personality disorder is difficult to diagnose and treat, Dr. Dimitriu says, "In milder cases, optimizing mood, anxiety, and impulsivity with medication and therapy can reduce the likelihood of some of these behaviors." This can also help people develop empathy in some instances.
The problem, though, is that people with the disorder usually don’t recognize their behaviors as problematic, Marcum says, "They tend to externalize and blame their environment (or the circumstances and people around them) for their problems." With treatment, they can gain insight and become more self-aware, but they must want to change.
People with antisocial personality traits typically enter treatment for reasons that will give them a direct benefit, Marcum says. For instance, someone who committed a crime may comply with court-ordered treatment simply to reduce their sentence.
"It’s less common for individuals with antisocial features to come to therapy to work on these symptoms," she says. "Instead, they may come to work on depression or anxiety, and then within the context of the therapy, their antisocial symptoms are identified."
Treatment is also difficult because people with antisocial behaviors sometimes view themselves as victims, who don’t have a choice but to engage in destructive or exploitative behaviors to survive, Kennedy says. “Sometimes, antisocial individuals may become motivated to change their behavior to experience fewer consequences in their lives.”
You Might Also Like
