6 Outdated Discipline Techniques You Should Never Use

Temper tantrums are never pretty, but don't bust out a "go to your room!" the next time your child has a meltdown. Discipline techniques that involve a physical or even emotional disconnection can actually cause major problems in the long run, says Vanessa Lapointe, Ph. D., author of Discipline Without Damage.

"We know scientifically that children actually need an emotional connection with their parents in order to be okay," she says. "The damaging effects of those kinds of discipline play out neurologically and then of course affect the child in their development and their sense of self."

Instead of "tricking" your child into doing what you want, Lapointe says the key to good behavior is building a solid relationship. When kids feel a strong attachment, they actually want to please their parents. They may not always deliver (because they're, you know, kids) but they'll come to terms with the rules.

"It's stepping into your role as adult, defining what the boundary is and holding that boundary with firmness but also compassion and kindness," she says. "It's as simple as saying, 'No, and I know you're upset ' or "No, and I understand your frustration.'"

With that in mind, here are six common strategies moms and dads are best to avoid: