These Are the 4 Most Unfriendly Myers-Briggs Personality Types, According to a Psychotherapist
Everybody's different, and we've all had our own unique experiences in life that have shaped us. In the intricate tapestry of human personalities, the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) stands out as one of the most renowned and widely-used personality assessment tools. The MBTI identifies individuals' preferences across four areas: extraversion (E) vs. introversion (I), sensing (S) vs. intuition (N), thinking (T) vs. feeling (F), and judging (J) vs. perceiving (P), resulting in 16 personality types. It ultimately indicates differing psychological preferences in how people perceive the world and make decisions.
While each Myers-Briggs personality type carries its unique strengths and charms, some personalities have been perceived as less friendly than others. Mayya Fleyshmakher MA, LPC is a licensed clinical psychotherapist who utilizes the MBTI in her own private practice to help clients with their career choices and advancements as they progress. Here, she offers her expert insight to answer the ultimate question: what are the most unfriendly Myers-Briggs personality types?
The Most Unfriendly Myers-Briggs Personality Types, According to a Psychotherapist
There is no singular Myers-Briggs personality type that can be drawn as the most unfriendly of them all. However, particular dichotomies of these differing types may make them seem more unfriendly than others.
Fleyshmakher tells Parade, "The 'Thinking' (T) types might be more prone to exhibit cold or detached behavior due to their focus on logic and objectivity over emotional considerations." She continues, "They may lack empathy, therefore portraying signs of misattunement, appearing to be unfriendly and even selfish."
These "Thinking" types that may seem more unfriendly include INTJ, INTP, ENTJ and ENTP. And out of all the types to be considered the most unfriendly Myers-Briggs personality types, Fleyshmakher says that the INTJ seems to face more isolating behaviors due to introverted tendencies. This often leads them to be more reserved and less empathetic towards others.
So, if you're friends with one of these "Thinking" Myers-Briggs types, try to keep in mind that they are not purposely being unfriendly. These personality types tend to lean on facts and logic over acting on emotion.
"It's crucial to remember that such traits do not necessarily indicate hostility or unkindness; rather, they reflect a different approach to processing and expressing emotions. When factoring in trauma, you might even meet 'Thinking' types who utilize this personality trait to bypass dealing with complex emotions, often resorting to numbing responses," Fleyshmakher explains.
Related: Don't Identify as an Introvert or an Extrovert? You Might Be an Ambivert—Here's What That Means
Important Considerations When Using the MBTI
The most important consideration to remember when utilizing the MBTI is that no personality type is inherently unfriendly. People are complex and unique beings, and it's imperative that the role of individual trauma is not overlooked.
"Determining more or less 'friendlier' types of the MBTI requires consideration as to how trauma affects these personality traits in the first place," Fleyshmakher explains.
Our society had long associated the word "trauma" with intense experiences, like abuse and war combat. However, the updated definition of trauma is generally understood as an emotional response to a distressing or disturbing event(s) that overwhelms an individual's ability to cope.
Fleyshmakher adds, "Considering how we now define trauma, more and more individuals report that they have experienced some level of trauma in their lifetime." She continues, "The Myers-Briggs and its types present limitations, as it does not set out to factor the role of trauma on personality."
As with any tool similar to the MBTI, it's not a one-size-fits-all and must be carefully reviewed, relative to each person. When considering individualized trauma and the use of the MBTI, some trauma responses may mimic the Myers-Briggs personality features.
"Individuals with trauma symptoms exhibit hyper-independence, overthinking and mistrust. Many of my clients are shocked to find out that what they thought was part of their personalities, turned out to be symptoms, which quickly changed once they completed trauma work." Fleyshmakher adds, "Therefore, what may seem as the unfriendly, introverted types of the MBTI, are really just the symptoms of difficult childhoods and stress."
Related: 15 Surprising Signs That Mean You're Likely an Empath, According to Psychologists
The Most Friendly Myers-Briggs Personality Types
Contrasting their highly-logical counterparts, the "Feeling" (F) types tend to prioritize empathy and emotions in their decision-making process, often leading to a more friendly demeanor. These more friendly Myers-Briggs personality types include INFJ, INFP, ENFJ and ENFP.
"The ability to display empathy is a key factor in fostering healthy platonic and romantic relationships and overall, 'Feeling' types come off as the friendlier types of the Myers-Briggs," Fleyshmakher shares. "Individuals who struggle in finding the right partner often overlook prioritizing empathy as above looks or status. These types might find more success in looking to formulate relationships with 'Feeling' types."
Fleyshmakher tells Parade that she often shies away from creating rigid definitions of personality because there is usually always more work lying beneath the surface. She touches upon her own experience from a psychotherapist's lens: "I have met many 'Feeling' types who fall under the ENFP types that upon doing deeper work in therapy, learned their complacent and often lovable, friendly demeanor was a learned behavior from childhood, specifically in learning to survive with abrasive, volatile and harsh parents."
Related: Here's How Analyzing Your Handwriting Can Reveal Your Personality Traits, Plus 5 Things to Look For
Is the MBTI an Effective Tool?
Overall, the MBTI can provide insight into an individual's preferences and tendencies. It helpfully indicates differing psychological preferences in how people perceive the world and make decisions. However, the MBTI should not be used as a definitive assessment of personality or as the sole basis for therapeutic interventions.
In her own private practice, Fleyshmakher uses the MBTI to help clients with their career choices and advancements—with the important caveat that it is only utilized once a client has completed the appropriate clinical interventions to help them process and heal trauma.
Thus, therapists may use the MBTI to better understand a client's communication style, decision-making processes and coping mechanisms. But, considering individualized trauma and responses will allow for a more accurate reading of the Myers-Briggs assessment.
Next: 9 Ways To Begin Your Emotional Regulation Journey as an Adult, According to a Licensed Therapist
Meet the Expert
Mayya Fleyshmakher MA, LPC is a licensed clinical psychotherapist in private practice in Holmdel, New Jersey. Fleyshmakher specializes in trauma-focused EMDR Therapy and spreading awareness about the importance of trauma work, specifically in educating people about how they perceive, define and treat trauma.
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