3 Therapist-Approved Mental Strength Tips From Jordana Brewster

The Fast & Furious actress shares her top mental health strategies.

Every Monday on The Verywell Mind Podcast, Editor-in-Chief Amy Morin, LCSW, interviews authors, experts, entrepreneurs, athletes, musicians, and other inspirational people about the strategies that help them think, feel, and do their best in life.

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Meet Jordana Brewster

Jordana Brewster is an actress who is best known for her role as Mia Toretto in the "Fast & Furious" franchise. She also starred in the "Dallas" reboot as well as in "Lethal Weapon" and "Chainsaw Massacre."

She’s always been open about how she manages her mental health and the struggles she has encountered along the way. She’s previously spoken about her history of an eating disorder and the steps she takes to address her emotional well-being.

She’s been in therapy since she was in college and she says she and her husband sometimes attend couples counseling together.

On episode 259 of The Verywell Mind Podcast with Therapist Amy Morin, we take a deeper dive into the coping strategies Jordana uses to manage her mental health on a daily basis.

Jordana Brewster's Therapist-Approved Mental Strength Tips

While she shared lots of amazing tips and strategies, here are three of her mental strength-building strategies that as a therapist, I highly recommend.

Stop Trying to Achieve the Perfect Work/Life Balance

There’s a lot of talk about ensuring you are splitting your time and energy between work and family in a balanced manner. And it’s easy to get caught up in thinking that balance means equal. That’s not realistic.

There are going to be times in your life when work may require more of your attention. And times when your personal life requires more time and attention.

It’s easy to get caught up in thinking that balance means equal. That’s not realistic.

And everyone is different. Your family situation, your financial situation, the type of work you do, your personality, and the stage of life that you’re in are all going to be factored in where your time and energy goes.

So I was thrilled Jordana said she stopped trying to achieve the perfect balance. As a busy mom who just got remarried last year, she has a lot of family obligations. But her work schedule often requires her to be away from home for weeks at a time.

Rather than worry about creating an exact balance between work and family, she recognizes that things aren’t always going to be balanced. She accepts that there will be times when she needs to focus more on work and will have less time with her family. She’s learned to be OK with that.

Pick the Wellness Strategies That Work for You and Leave the Rest.

Jordana said a particular breathing exercise meant to reduce anxiety actually caused her to feel more anxious. So she quit doing it. And she doesn’t beat herself up about it. That’s healthy.

There are tons of wellness strategies out there. But just because something works for one person, doesn’t mean it will work for you.

You might find that a particular strategy–whether we’re talking about meditation or reframing your negative thoughts—takes too long to learn or takes more effort than it’s worth. If that’s the case, you might decide that strategy isn’t for you.

And you can break some of the wellness “rules” too. There’s a lot of advice out there about self-discipline and peak performance that you don’t need to follow.

You don’t need to wake up at 4 AM, exercise for 2 hours, take an ice bath, and meditate for 30 minutes all before you go to work if you don’t want to.

There are tons of wellness strategies out there. But just because something works for one person, doesn’t mean it will work for you.

So I loved that Jordana gave herself permission to quit something that didn’t meet her needs and she chose to keep the strategies that she does enjoy. She says she works on incorporating other coping skills into her life, like journaling, mindfulness, and running.

Just because one thing doesn’t work for you, doesn’t mean something else won’t, however.  Whether it’s working with a specific therapist, trying a certain medication, or using various self-help strategies, there are many different things that work for different people.

You get to pick what you want to try—sort of like an a la carte menu for your life.

Related:Stress and Anxiety Relief: 10 Strategies That Can Help

Ignore the Editor in Your Brain

Jordana said that she became brave when she stopped listening to “the editor” in her brain who tried to tell her to act differently or to avoid saying certain things so she could make a good impression.

Imagining an editor trying to edit out things so you don’t present yourself in a certain way is a great way to think about your brain’s worries that you aren’t going to fit in.

Jordana said when she stopped listening to that editor, she felt brave enough to do things she didn’t dare do when she was younger because she stopped worrying so much about editing everything she did or said.

You don’t have to just go around trying to be the edited version of yourself in hopes you’ll be liked.  It can be really liberating to know that it’s OK if not everyone likes you.

That’s not to say you might not act in a different way in different situations. You might not talk to your boss or your grandmother the same way you talk to your friends. Being socially appropriate is very healthy. But editing yourself because you’re trying to be liked isn’t.

You don’t have to just go around trying to be the edited version of yourself in hopes you’ll be liked.  It can be really liberating to know that it’s OK if not everyone likes you.

How to Build Mental Strength

There are many ways to build mental strength and manage your mental health. You can learn about new strategies to try by learning about the steps other people take to build their mental muscles.

While you might not adopt all the same strategies that work for someone else, you can take the ones that you want to try and apply them to your life. You might find that some of the strategies that help Jordana build mental strength might work for you as well.

Read Next:As a Therapist, Here Are 5 Things I Wish More People Understood About Mental Strength