28 Extremely Specific Things That Are In Basically Every Single Man's Apartment In His Early 20s
Maybe it was you. Maybe it was a friend of yours. Maybe it was a friend of a friend of a friend with a four-foot bong. The fact is, every single person on Earth knows someone who, between the ages of 18 and 25, lived in an apartment with...
1.A coffee table that is absolutely filled to the brim with random trash:
2.Complete with crusty ol' weed from an undetermined amount of time ago...
3....a burned-out ocean-themed scented candle that doubles as an ashtray...
4....an old Domino's box from AT LEAST two weekends ago:
5.And, of course, at least one random video game controller standing alone in the midst of the chaos:
6.A living room with a couch that looks like it's had a lifetime supply of asses sit on it...
7....generally with some dude who doesn't live there crashing on it at like 2 p.m.:
8.Next to that is one singular "good chair" that seemed to be the sole domain of one dude:
9.And a patio chair that's secretly the best seat in the house:
10.The decorations must be either a random flag hung on the wall...
11....or a bunch of old beer cases delicately secured to the wall with electrical tape:
12.There's always a copious amount of empty liquor bottles on top of the kitchen cabinets...
...next to several jugs of protein powder that no one can reach without climbing on the counter:
13.The fridge needs to have basically nothing in it except for some beer and an expired pack of chicken:
14.And a gallon of milk with exactly THIS much left shoved way into the back:
15.The kitchen also has to have a sink piled full of "somebody else's" dishes:
16.A full roll of paper towels directly next to an empty roll:
17.And a garbage can that looks like the world's stickiest game of Jenga:
18.Inside the bathroom there's always a toilet paper roll with either a mere sliver of TP left...
...or a full roll nestled on top of an older roll:
19.The bathroom sink should also be completely filled hairs of undetermined origin:
20.And the bathtub must have a very similar hairy vibe:
21.No bathroom is complete without a razor in the shower that no one has used in months and is quickly becoming a tetanus hazard:
22.A bottle of 3-in-1 shampoo-conditioner-mouthwash that's been half full since freshman year:
23.And, of course, a bar of soap with one single pube on it:
I ain't finding a picture of that.
24.Under no circumstances can there be any hand towels in the bathroom. You have to use a damp, musty shower towel to dry your hands:
25.Every bedroom has a mattress pushed into the corner with absolutely no bed frame:
26.A bed sheet taped to the wall in lieu of a curtain:
27.And blinds that are out here fighting for their LIFE:
28.Lastly, no early twentysomething's apartment is complete without a smoke detector that either is unplugged or has been beeping for weeks:
The pièce de résistance. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.
