17 People Shared How They Put "Microfeminism" Into Practice Daily, And We Should All Take Note
On TikTok, people are going viral for sharing how they practice "microfeminism" — the small but intentional actions they do to make the world a little more equitable.
We recently featured a few creators who shared how they practice "microfeminism," which included speaking up when men are talking over women, scheduling playdates as a father so the onus isn't always on mothers, and avoiding body-specific compliments towards women, just to name a few.
In the comments, people had so many more "microfeminisms" to add — I had to share them:
1."My husband and I were both present for the house inspection when we were purchasing our house, and the inspector was very clearly and obviously speaking to *me,* rather than directing every comment to my husband. I pointed it out to my husband after and mentioned how wonderful and unexpected it was, and he hadn't even noticed. I was so thrilled. It just goes to show how low the bar is for how we expect to be treated!"
2."My daughter's school's mascot is a gender-neutral mascot that we'll call the 'Mascots.' In the time-honored tradition of the 50s, the women's teams were called the 'Lady Mascots.' Her sport, which has both male and female teams, pushed back and insisted that they are ALL called the 'Mascots.'"
"I would like to add that once the guys discovered this was an issue for the women, they fully supported the team unity and petitioned as well."
3."I work in the public library. We have mini book displays in the stacks where we're supposed to put new books as they come in. There's only a small amount of space on those displays, and if I have several books to choose from, I'll always display books written by women, people of color, LGBTQ+, and minorities first."
4."One of the owners of my company does all of the accounting. No matter what, he lists clients in his system with the man's name first 'because that's the way it should be.' To counter, I always list the woman first when I write up all contracts. It's small, but it gives me joy."
5."Just yesterday, a 50-something female coworker and I (also female and long done with menopause) received an email from a male coworker with the salutation, 'Hi, girls.' I responded with a simple but to the point, 'Thank you, boy.'"
6.On Instagram, one user wrote, "I don't comment on what people (women specifically) are eating other than saying it smells or looks delicious."
7."I'm a teacher, and I try to anthropomorphize animals as female or gender-neutral whenever I can. A disproportionate number of animal characters are male, and unless obvious 'girl' indicators are present (color, bows, tutu, etc.), people assume that stuffed animals are male."
"I also email both parents whenever possible. I must say I do see an increase in dads getting involved in their kid's school life: homework, volunteering, attending parent-teacher meetings. It's encouraging!"
8."I work and volunteer for nonprofit organizations, so I have requested that they list both names of a married couple in the newsletter's listing donors instead of the traditional 'Mr. & Mrs. Man's name then last name.' I think the woman's name is just important to know, and I may influence other donors by knowing her as well."
9."If a man interrupts me or tries to override my story/point in a group context, I straight up say 'I'm still speaking' and continue with my story/point. They are usually so shocked, lol. I don't do this in an aggressive tone, just as a matter of fact. Also, if another woman is speaking and a man cuts them off, I will say, 'I'm still listening' to them."
"Or, I'll address the group, 'Sorry, I don't think [person] got to finish.' Just stuff like that. It really sucks when I see a woman, or even a quieter dude telling an awesome story they're excited about, get totally overrode and see their face fall."
10."I am a professor, and on the first day of class, I ask students to write the name they would like to be called and their pronouns on a notecard, and I take it at the end of class. I use the notecards to take roll and learn their names and pronouns. Letting them tell me who they are instead of just calling names off the class roll sheet empowers them and sets a tone of respect for everyone in the class for the whole semester. This is not a SMALL detail for many of them."
11."My microfeminism (I am a man) is that when writing or speaking to or about a subject that has indefinite gender, instead of writing 'he or she,' 'him or her,' or 'his or hers,' I always reverse the order, saying 'she or he,' etc... It's quite a small thing, but my three grown daughters have noticed and approved. Even my ex is down with it!"
12."When I worked in a movie theater, I always made sure to look at the woman back and forth with the man when asking what they'd like. I'd ask him a question and then ask her a question, or vice versa. So many people JUST speak to the man; the woman is just meant to sit there or is barely acknowledged."
Similarly, "I'm a server, and I always acknowledge the woman/women first when serving tables... I direct my small talk at the girls or compliment their outfits :)."
13."My microfeminism is calling men 'bossy' and women 'bosses' (only when necessary, like if the man is being an asshat) because I remember as a kid, I liked to take control of group projects and was always called bossy while the boys were just referred to as 'boss' and that frustrated me."
14."I'm 66, so I've dealt with lots of misogyny and have practiced 'microfeminism' for decades, I guess. Health insurance for my family was through my job. I went to a new dentist; on the forms you filled out, there was a block for spouse, so I filled it in. The first statement I received from them was addressed to my husband's name."
"When I asked the dentist's office why, when it's my insurance, I'm the patient, and my husband doesn't even go there, they said it's their 'policy.' After asking them to correct this a few times, I told them I would find a new dentist if I got one more statement addressed to him. The next statement was addressed to me."
15.Continued: "As I said, I'm 66, so back in the day when everyone sent Christmas cards, I (of course) was always the one to fill them out and mail them. When she wrote letters to me, my husband's mom would always address the letters to Mrs. John Doe (husband's name). Everything addressed to a couple always had his name first, then hers (priorities, you know...).
"So whenever I filled out the Christmas cards, I signed them from Jane and John. My husband confronted me about it once, and I told him I'd be happy for him to fill out the cards, and he could sign them however he chose. He didn't take me up on my offer..."
16."I've always chosen women doctors for any of my medical needs. It's strange — people always assume doctors are men if you talk about your doctors' visits. I also try to select women professionals whenever possible for things like house painting, landscaping, or tax professionals. Women listen more."
And lastly:
17."Years ago, when I was checking in at the front desk for my orthopedist appointment, the receptionist asked me for my husband's name. Why they always do that, I don't know. After I gave her my husband's name and asked her why she needed it, she asked me why my husband and I had different last names. I told her it was because my husband did not change his name when we married."
Got any more small but mighty ways you make the world more equal and equitable for women? Let me know in the comments!
Note: Some replies have been edited for length and/or clarity.
