17 Hilarious Tweets From Witty Women That Left Me In Stitches
My Twitter algorithm was algorithm-ing this week and showed me so many funny girl tweets. Here are 17 of them.
Make sure you follow these people, too, if you liked their tweets!
me psyching myself for the one day a week i go to the office pic.twitter.com/ekEbqUr3zh
— lucy ford 🍊 (@lucyj_ford) December 8, 2023
the second week when you’re getting paid biweekly: https://t.co/PMymjxoNW7
— kira 👾 (@kirawontmiss) December 8, 2023
i hate when i’m telling a story and someone tells me to “get to the point.” can’t you see i am taking the scenic route
— trash jones (@jzux) December 7, 2023
i’m actually a very self aware person i just like to do stuff for the plot sometimes
— ambreia. (@rhyamb) December 7, 2023
Therapist asked how I was doing yesterday to which I grimly responded "Diva down"
— ava 🇵🇸 (@wownicebuttdude) December 7, 2023
Christmas is way prettier when you have astigmatism.
— ✧･ﾟ: bri ﾟ✧*: (@_brimarr) December 7, 2023
You gotta stab your salad 4 times to activate the dressing
— ROYALE (@royalepains) December 7, 2023
was worried my period is late but i just felt an unexplainable wave of anxious despair so i guess she’ll be here soon
— awalmartparkinglot ✨🪩🕺🏼🖤 (@awalmartparking) December 9, 2023
hope he ignores other girls the way he ignores the flower section
— jazmin (@itsnotjazminn) December 9, 2023
deleting my dating apps and meeting people the old fashion way (3+ years of a sexually tense friendship that devolves into weird cat and mouse games until one of us has to start seeing a psychiatrist)
— ℜ𝔞𝔠𝔥𝔢𝔩 𝔈𝔩𝔦𝔷𝔞𝔟𝔢𝔱𝔥 🍒 (@chaotic_sub) December 8, 2023
let’s play 21 questions! first question, are you mad at me?
— 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐞 (@prettytheyswag) December 9, 2023
My niece want a Easy bake oven them shits $180 baby u getting an air fryer
— , (@sgrate_) December 8, 2023
wait! We have to go back to pound town I left my purse
— Iris (@1R_1S) December 9, 2023
ima lover girl fr but y’all make me act like my dad
— ©🎀 (@casbby888) December 7, 2023
nobody:my eyes in pictures pic.twitter.com/ZIlr8TN9Q1
— Invis🧜♀️ (@invis4yo) December 9, 2023
had a dream i was at party & i looked over to my friend and said “girl im drunk. matter fact im not drunk, im just sleepy.” then i thought about it and said “wait im sleeping...” the way the music at the party just HAULTED and she just froze. not me breaking the 4th wall
— Dulsè (@JadeDaGem) December 8, 2023
who gonna tell her pic.twitter.com/gOVObcSjvz
— non aesthetic things (@PicturesFoIder) December 8, 2023
Want to read more funny tweets? Check out our weekend roundup here.
