The Best Places to Buy an Engagement Ring
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Compared to finding a soulmate amongst the billions of people on this planet, picking out an engagement ring is simple. But that doesn’t mean it’s not tricky. The days of simply heading to the mall and picking out a ring with a price tag of three months of salary aren’t exactly over, but there are a growing number of options—lab-grown, vintage, and direct-to-consumer online retailers among them—available even as the numbers of soon-to-be betrothed dwindle.
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Beyond the nuts and bolts of ring shopping—cut, color, clarity, carats, cost—it’s important to consider the meaning of an engagement ring. A massive new diamond means something different than a modest vintage ring, which means something different than a ring built around a non-diamond stone. A ring shouldn’t (and usually can’t) change a “no” to a “yes,” but the fact that it’s a big purchase for a life partner means there’s still no shortage of reasons to pick the right one.
What the Experts Say
The best engagement ring is probably a family heirloom—inherently meaningful, timelessly beautiful, and free. Barring that kind of luck, aspiring fiances are left weighing the pros and cons of the different kinds of places to buy engagement rings.
“Ultimately, the best choice for an engagement ring depends on the individual buyer’s values, budget, and the experience they desire,” says Jordan Cullen, the founder and director of Australian brand Cullen Jewellery. He did point out that one factor to consider is after-sales support, which can be more limited at smaller operations when compared to national chain jewelers, for instance.
Private jeweler Kim Hoyt, owner of LA-based Haus of Hoyt, says that “the biggest misconception that men have is that rings are way more expensive than they think,” both because lab-grown diamonds are relatively inexpensive and there are lots of places to buy rings, including from a custom jeweler like herself.
Where to Buy an Engagement Ring
National Chains
National chain jewelry stores like Zales, Jared, and Kay offer “a wide range of designs and the security of established business practices,” according to Cullen. They’re ubiquitous, accessible, and easy to shop in person or online. In recent years, they’ve also made strides to keep pace with the rest of the industry, offering custom and personalized options made to customer specifications.
Cullen says that where these stores can fall short is in the quality of their mass-produced offerings, which can lack the nuance and stability of rings made by smaller, more personal operations.
Mom and Pop Stores
Speaking of which, a local jewelry store that isn’t part of a national chain might offer a more personable shopping experience the same way a local clothing boutique or wine store does. And if it’s been in business for a long time, it’s probably a safe bet if any post-sales services, from resizing to cleaning to setting a loose stone, should be needed.
Of course, being a smaller business probably also means a smaller selection of rings. A local store that doesn’t have the right ring is unfortunately not worth buying from, and it’s not as though it’s impossible to get a personal touch during a ring shopping experience.
Ring Designers
The personal and expensive nature of an engagement ring means that working directly with a compatible jewelry designer makes sense for a lot of people.
“When you go to a custom private jeweler like myself, you are getting luxury brand service at a wholesale price,” says Hoyt. “I don’t have the overhead like big name retailers do, so I don’t have to add costs on top to cover those expenses. It’s a win-win for my clients because they really truly get a reasonable price with exceptional service.”
But while a custom jeweler who really nails it can produce a fantastic, highly personal ring, it’s also easy to misplace that trust. “The reputation and quality of work of designers can greatly vary,” says Cullen, who says after-sales support that can be limited (especially when compared to, say, a national chain) as a downside of going the custom route with an individual designer.
Vintage Jewelers
“The main virtue of purchasing vintage is that it requires no new mining of the stones or metals,” according to Michael Magnotti, CEO of Bellevue, Washington-based vintage jewelry retailer Eragem. “Vintage rings often have intricate handcrafted details where rings now are CAD designed and cast,” he adds. The virtues of vintage jewelry, in other words, are similar to those of vintage clothing: low environmental impact and, if you’re willing to search for it, the opportunity for unique pieces made with techniques that are harder to find in modern pieces.
Magnotti cautions that “vintage” is being used by jewelry manufacturers and sellers to refer to a style instead of an era (i.e. a newly manufactured ring that’s made to look like an art deco ring from the ‘30s). It’s important to know the difference so you know what you’re paying for just as it’s important to do the same due diligence for a vintage ring in terms of knowing the origins and value of the materials as it is for a new ring. Eragem, for instance, offers independent appraisals and GIA certifications directly on its product pages.
Online Retailers
It’s nice to hold an engagement ring before buying it for the same reason it’s nice to test-drive a car. That being said, it’s not absolutely necessary for customers who know what they want. Beyond that, making sure that an online jeweler is legit is like making sure any other online retailer is legit. Read reviews, look for certifications from independent organizations like the Better Business Bureau, and don’t let any fine print go unread.
Lab-Grown Diamonds
In and around all of these different options are lab-grown diamonds. Vintage jewelers have even taken to placing lab-grown diamonds into vintage settings, a testament to the warping of the market a steady supply of relatively easy-to-manufacture diamonds has had on a market that’s traditionally defined by scarcity.
Lab-grown diamonds don’t come with all of the ethical and environmental baggage that mined diamonds do despite the fact that they’re identical to the untrained, unaided eye. They’re cheaper to buy, which also means they’re not worth as much if they’re ever sold. Beyond the financial, the only other consideration is whether a mined diamond means something to the recipient.
Frequently Asked Questions About Engagement Rings
How much should an engagement ring cost?
There’s no hard and fast rule. Treat an engagement ring like other major expenses in balancing the ideal with the practical, particularly in light of the ample expenses that tend to come with getting engaged and married.
Is a lab-grown diamond a real diamond?
Mary Smith of wedding website Vowness says “Lab-grown/synthetic diamonds have the same atomic makeup as their mined counterparts, and it’s impossible to tell the difference between the two without the use of special equipment.” In other words, the main difference between the two is that the buyer pays less and knows the diamond isn’t mined.
Is it OK to buy your own engagement ring?
There’s a lot of traditions and expectations that come with getting engaged. Whether and how to follow them are decisions couples should make together, so if both are cool with the engagement ring recipient picking out their future bling there’s certainly nothing wrong with that.
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