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By Dr. Alicia H. Clark
What’s the secret of true and lasting attractiveness? That’s what so many women (and men) want to know.
It turns out that self-care has a great deal to do with it … but not in the way you might think.
Not eyes, not legs, not a perfect body … but rather, happiness and kindness.
It turns out that beauty radiates from the inside, and the way truly attractive women create and radiate that inner beautify is through self care.
Here are 10 things highly attractive women do to take care of themselves that boosts their happiness and desirability:
1. They’re present in the moment and live life fully.
Despite the temptation to spend time passively surfing Facebook and gossip sites when bored and lonely, attractive women know they’re at their best when they go out with their friends and actively live their life.
And when they do go on Facebook or online, like in real life, they go to engage. They feel happier when they’re participating in activities, rather than watching.
2. They surround themselves with good friends.
If they live alone or have a quiet office environment, attractive women actively seek out social contact and friendship at the end of the day or work week. They regularly make time to connect (in person) with others.
When going out isn’t an option, they pick upf the phone, jump on Skype, or sit down to write a letter to feel the connection they know they need.
3. They keep their brains serenely stimulated (instead of numbing out).
When attractive women want to relax and give their brains a break, they listen to music or read a good book instead of watching TV. Why? Because they know getting lost in a TV show for hours makes them feel detached from themselves. But a great story or song helps them relax and keeps their imagination active, which helps them feel good when exhausted.
4. They exercise regularly.
Attractive women know that exercise is a vital part of what makes them feel vibrant and energetic … not just because it helps them stay in physical shape.
When they’re busy and their energy flags, these desirable ladies fit exercise into manageable time blocks. They pick exercises they enjoy, and often combine it with a social visit or another reward (i.e. favorite coffee shop or a relaxing post-workout steam).
These women understand that working out isn’t just about the end game, but rather, that moving her body is enjoyable, fun and feels good.
5. They eat right to fuel their vibrancy.
Attractive women make healthy food choices every day. And to keep eating well when things get busy, they start at home, cutting stressful, time-consuming preparation wherever they can. They buy precut vegetables, and prep the meal items (washing lettuce, trimming meat, or slicing fruit) before they put it away so it’s ready to go when they need it.
They invest in themselves this way — making sure to have healthy easy food at their fingertips, something experts say is a key to maintaining a healthy diet.
6. They prioritize sleep.
Sleep is the almighty secret weapon of truly glowing, happy women. A great night’s rest allows a woman’s best self (physically and emotionally) to shine through.
Everything from cell regeneration and healing (skin health) to optimizing mental clarity and mood stability (yes, sleep can make you happier) is improved by making time for adequate sleep (to the tune of 8 hours a night).
7. They always make time to play.
Life is serious enough. Knowing when to lighten up fuels a happy, attractive woman and helps her feel alive, so she regularly makes time for laughter and fun.
Play is anything that allows her to feel free, present, and engaged — and research confirms that playfulness is a top indicator of female attractiveness for men.
8. They allow themselves time to do nothing!
These bright women understand that they can only schedule themselves so much before feeling irritable, so they leave white space in their calendar allowing flexibility they need to feel balanced.
Healthy, attractive people understand their body’s need for freedom and flexibility, and they make room for this by scheduling down time.
9. They know how to keep their relationships strong.
Attractive women aren’t always thinking about themselves — they are good friends, too. They understand that investing in their friendships keeps those relationships strong, and that loving on their friends feels good (something research has shown boosts happiness and satisfaction).
10. They show up … for themselves.
Finally, attractive vibrant women understand that being their best requires being a friend to themselves first.
When shame creeps up, healthy women take a mindset of compassion and kindness toward themselves. They know that honoring their own needs and choices is key to finding balance within themselves and staying positive.
For example, if they sleep until 1pm, they know they needed the rest. If they lounge in their PJs all day, they know they need the quiet downtime. If they stay up late with their friends, they know they need the connection.
They don’t berate themselves. And they keep fighting with others over their needs or choices to a minimum, and this feels good.
The real secret of attractiveness is regular and compassionate SELF CARE!
Truly attractive women create habits around doing things that are not only good for them but also feel good and maximize their beauty.
Self care doesn’t have to feel like a burden, and it can start anywhere you feel out of balance.
Once you tap into how good you feel, self care quickly stops being a chore, and starts being something you actually want to do. And you’ll look so much more attractive for the effort.
It’s OK if making yourself a priority feels really hard at first. Stay with it, and you’ll soon notice the benefits build on themselves with practice.
If you find yourself needing a bit of extra support on your path to better self care and awareness, check out my website or sign up for my newsletter to receive weekly helpful support on wellness, relationships, and parenting delivered directly to your inbox.
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