Why I Run With Mad Men

How one woman turned a TV addiction into an exercise routine.

I don’t know when I became such a TV addict, but it must have something to do with childhood. Growing up, we were only allowed “one hour a day”—and I think I’m still rebelling. On top of that, there was the cultural phenomenon that was Six Feet Under, The Sopranos and Sex & the City—where television became art, as I became an adult. Art is essential to a life well lived. Right?!

Alas, as much as I love TV, I dislike feeling lazy. “Sedentary” has never worked for me. It’s part of the reason I’m a freelance writer and (irrationally) afraid of sitting in an office. I need to move, and I’ve always considered exercise a treasure, not a chore.

Yet throughout the years, as my television intake evolved, the more slothful I had become. Sure, I’d go spinning or running on many afternoons, but the more stressful my day, the longer I’d clock in as a couch potato at night; for every thought of an ex-boyfriend, another hour of Bravo TV; the more sleep I needed, the more episodes of Enlightened consumed. Was I slacker-bound?

This winter, my best friend—a TV and exercise fanatic like me—saved me from myself by teaching me how to marry the two. Around the holidays, she gave me a Fire HDX Tablet and Amazon Prime subscription. The card read: “Take this to the gym, thank me later.” Best. Gift. Ever. Access to a million new shows I was dying to watch (Transparent! The Americans!) and a shiny new toy that could mesh with my favorite machines? An embarrassment of riches…but where to begin?!

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I started with Transparent on the treadmill. The Silverlake-central show made me nostalgic for hiking in Los Angeles, so I planted my Fire on the treadmill’s ledge and worked my way into an ultra-steep climb. Three episodes later, I’d hiked for 1.5 hours, burned 600 calories and fallen in love with Jeffrey Tambor as a woman and a father.

Then I started season one of The Americans on a stationary bike—resistance up super-high. As the plots twisted and turned, I’d pedal faster and harder, until my inner aerobic state was as intense as Keri Russell’s on a covert mission.

My shows and my Fire even got me to do push-ups. Now, on the record, I hate push-ups with a passion, but when I place the TV screen on the ground, and found myself face-to-face with Sons of Anarchy’s tat’ed Charlie Hunnam I really didn’t mind, um, pushing my body up and down…and up and down.

As winter turned to spring, I found myself craving the combination of TV plus exercise, the way one would TV plus, say, salted caramel ice cream. Without knowing or trying, I had trained my body to move to the tube. I turned a guilty pleasure in a healthy pleasure—and honestly, thanks to meth-heads and motorcycle gangs and Mad Men—it wasn’t even a difficult transition.

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Speaking of Mad Men, which starts again tonight, my cardio-television-life couldn’t peak at a better time. Thanks to a monster session on the elliptical I’m finally all caught up. My exercise-pal Aly Teich from The Sweat Life suggests I try the full-body-burn of rowing to keep with the retro-dapper theme, but this seems to be the only machine I can’t balance my Fire on. (Insert frown face).

It’s okay; I think I’ll watch it on the Stepmill, because, well, Don Draper loves a great ass.

While most Mad Men fans will be settling in for the return of season 7 this evening around 10 pm EST, I’ll have my Fire close by on Monday morning, waiting for the push notification that the episode is available for viewing. Then I can head to the gym for my personal version of the Sunday night ritual. Because let’s face it: Watching whatever you’re in the mood for, while exercising whichever way you want to, is a luxury of Roger Sterling proportions.

Here’s to a new season of dirty martinis and tablet-induced push-ups.

By Alyssa Shelasky

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