Rob and Chyna Have an Awkward Encounter on "KUWTK"
Three years ago, Kanye West took a career's worth of aggression out on the press by marrying Kim Kardashian smack in the middle of a holiday weekend, ensuring that no one who wrote about music or celebrity would have three full days off. (You will never, ever convince me that Kanye didn't do this on purpose.) I only mention that in order to point out that in the scheme of things, a Keeping Up With the Kardashians episode on the Sunday of Memorial Day weekend isn't THAT bad. I guess. Let's get into it.
Kourtney Kan't Decide Obliterating the need for my "reality TV is fake" subcategory this week, Khloé decides that Kourtney is too indecisive and devises a series of challenges for her that were definitely 100% her idea without any help from a producer. Look, am I above watching Kourtney Kardashian pretend to be a firefighter? Anyone who's read these recaps over the years knows that the answer is "hell no." But what I'd been loving about season 13 of KUWTK is how it's stayed rooted mostly in the family's real-life experiences, with a pretty admirable level of candor. Storylines like this not only make it harder for me to shore up my traditional, "This show is basically the women's real lives" argument; they also bore me.
ANYWAY, first Khloé fucks with Kourtney by switching restaurant plans around. Khloé calls this an "experiment" and a "lesson"; Kourtney is not amused, but agrees her indecisiveness is an issue. She then uses the word "debilitating" six or seven times. After an afternoon of would-you-rather style games doesn't do the trick either, Khloé pulls out the big guns and arranges for a ride along with a real-life Los Angeles Fire Department truck. I'm hoping this means Khloé also bought everyone at that fire station new gears and new fire trucks? Everyone yells at Kourtney for being indecisive during a mock fire, but I feel like that has less to do with her personality and more to do with the fact that she doesn't... .know how to fight fires? You can't choose types of ladders when you don't know what types of ladders exist in the universe! The moral winds up being more "Kourtney is sort of bad at stuff" rather than "Kourtney is indecisive," although in the end, all of her problems are sort of solved by watching a Tony Robbins documentary. Authentic, organic storytelling!
Stray Observation Is Kendall actually the most interesting Kardashian/Jenner, or do I just feel like that because she's literally never around? (We'll probably know more next week, because apparently in that episode, she hangs out with Caitlyn and Jay Leno, a sentence I truly never thought I'd type.)
Koaching Rob Rob and his life coach are at it again this week, beginning with a second session at the gym where Jamel simply observes Rob working out with his trainer (who utters the adorably folksy sentiment, "I don't want you spoken to if you're spoken for!" regarding setting up Rob on a date). Seriously, for what Rob is paying this dude, he can't at least work out alongside him? Jamel asks Rob, essentially, what his birthday wish is, and for the millionth time, Rob says that he wants to have a good relationship with Chyna so he can be a good dad to Dream.
What bums me out most about this is that, sure, I talk about major relationship stuff like this with my therapist, but more than that, I talk it through with my girlfriends, either face-to-face or in endless group text threads. It feels like aside from family, Rob only has Jamel to talk to, and while I'm all for support wherever you can get it, it's nice to have friends. Also, if we're really treating this season as Rob's rehabilitation tour, maybe don't open the episode with him and Scott driving around Calabasas, road raging and talking shit? Just a thought.
Jamel suggests that he and Rob surprise Chyna at a photo shoot, as a means of friendship and support. He suggests this even though Rob can't recall the last time he saw Chyna face-to-face, and even though Rob is wearing a surgical mask because his lip "looks weird." These are not exactly ideal circumstances under which to roll up to your baby mama's WORK EVENT, and, accordingly, it doesn't go very well. Chyna is cordial, but a bit baffled and understandably kind of uncomfortable. After, Rob complains, "Everything's just off. That shit just bugs me. It's just frustrating," which suggests to me that a good activity for life coaching hours might be giving him more specific language with which to describe his feelings? Rob ends up getting some much-needed advice about loving and communicating with himself first, and he and Chyna have a good pediatrician appointment with the baby, but it's all a little sad. With the anti-vaccination movement being what it is, especially in California, I'm actually pretty stoked that they had Dream vaccinated on camera, though.
NYFW In what feels a little bit like a sideways pilot for Kylie's reality show (living for it//can't wait), we take a little trip to her pop-up shop during New York Fashion Week, and it's a super cute space. Kim visits, too, and brings out lip kits from the back to give away to strangers, after first getting assurance from Kylie that she won't have to pay for them. It is a deep "Kylie is the new Kim" moment, but not at all in an adversarial way, and it made me want a Kylie lip kit despite the fact that I don't really wear any makeup at all, so mission accomplished, guys!
We also go backstage at Kanye's NYFW show, and it's one of the first times we've seen him on camera since his breakdown. He seems…good? It feels voyeuristic to speculate and entitled to want to know more, and yet I am and I do, which makes watching his fashion show that extra measure of complicated. The looks were textbook Yeezy and it was only a little bizarre that Kanye didn't come out to take a bow - Kim simply ducked backstage, while everyone just sat there. Also: really glad KUWTK made sure to include footage of Hamila Aden, who walked Kanye's show wearing a hijab.
Last Words "So…are these fireproof?" -Kourtney Kardashian, while putting on pants and a jacket handed to her by an actual firefighter
Follow Lauren on Twitter and Cosmo Celeb on Facebook.
You Might Also Like
