'RHONY' Alumna Cindy Barshop on Life After Brain Cancer: ‘I Had to Relearn Even Basic Things’ (Exclusive)

The former reality TV star and founder of VSpot was diagnosed with a rare form of lymphoma in 2022

It was April 2022, and Cindy Barshop was at the Princess Juliana International Airport in St. Maarten, on her way home to New York after enjoying a week-long spring break in St. Barts with her then 12-year-old twins, daughter Zoe and son Jesse. But when Barshop attempted to board the plane, the airline staff refused to let her on, claiming she was too intoxicated.

“I was drinking a beer, it was no big deal,” recalls the Real Housewives of New York City alumna and founder of Completely Bare, the former New York-based waxing and laser hair removal salon. “All of a sudden, the airport security came over to me and said, ‘You're not allowed to leave, you're not acting appropriately.’” Confused and frightened, Barshop, 59, sent her children home on the plane with friends who were traveling with them while she stayed behind. “I didn’t even know what I did,“ she says. “But they thought I was off. It was the weirdest thing.”

The next day Barshop appeared coherent to the airline staff and was allowed to fly home, where she was eager to get back to work, opening a second location of her latest venture, a women's intimate health spa called VSpot.

But just days later, she suddenly started acting oddly again — this time while attending a charity event with her fiance, Jay Cardiello. “I was eating my fish with my fingers, then I passed out,” she says. “Everyone thought I was drunk.” The last thing she remembers was Cardiello taking her to the emergency room.

Four days later, Barshop, who had been experiencing what she thought was stress-related headaches for months, was diagnosed with Primary Central Nervous System Lymphoma (also known as CNS lymphoma), an extremely rare cancer (approximately 1,500 patients in the U.S. are diagnosed per year, according to the Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center) in which malignant cells form in the lymph tissue of the brain and/or spinal cord.

While there is no known genetic link for CNS lymphoma, which has a five-year survival rate of 30 percent, Barshop’s mother succumbed to the disease in 2013. “It’s very uncommon,” says Elena Pentsova, Head Neurologist and Neuro-Oncologist at Memorial Sloan Kettering, who treated both Barshop and her mother.

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“I was shocked by the diagnosis,” recalls her brother, Howie Barshop, 62, who tried to put aside his own emotions to focus on his sister’s care, as well as his niece and nephew’s well-being. “They were devastated. They went to bed not knowing if their mom was going to die.”

The next few months were a blur of chemo appointments. “She really couldn’t do much other than go to the hospital for her treatments then come home and sleep,” says Howie, who was in charge of dispensing the 15 different medications Barshop had to take. “That, in itself, was a full-time job.”

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In August 2022, after four months of chemo, an MRI showed that Barshop was cancer free. But due to the nature of the lymphoma, doctors advised her to undergo an Autologous Stem Cell Transplant in November. The transplant treatment involves a higher dose of chemotherapy to clear out any residual cancer cells that cannot be detected by an MRI, and could lead to a potential relapse. As a result, it usually leaves the patient severely weakened and with a very low white blood cell count. “You’re basically starting over like a newborn,” says Dr. Michael Scordo, a Bone Marrow Transplant Specialist and Cellular Therapist who treated Barshop. “You’re at risk for sickness and disease as you have no vaccines such as flu, polio and chicken pox.”

While the stem cell transplant, which required a two-week hospital stay followed by months of recovery at home, was crucial for keeping Barshop cancer-free, it was also the most grueling part of her journey. “I was so sick after it. My body was worn out,” she recalls. “I couldn’t stand or even sit up because they had done so much chemo in such a short period of time.”

Desperate for relief from the pain, she says she wasted ‘thousands of dollars” on alternative medicine in the hopes that something would help. “I was bloated and nauseous all of the time. I gained 40 pounds and just felt horrible.”

She was also left with cognitive issues that made it difficult to execute even basic tasks, like putting sugar in her coffee. “It was a horrific situation because my brain wasn’t functioning at full capacity,” she recalls. (She still sees a psychiatrist at NYU where she does brain exercises to improve her memory and cognition.)

Even with her physical and mental struggles, Barshop’s primary concern was her twins who had to witness their mother in what she describes as “agonizing pain.” She says that despite having their “worlds flipped upside down overnight, they rose to the occasion and handled every aspect with kindness and compassion.” She credits their “positive attitudes” and “endless love” for getting her through the ordeal. “Their hundreds of kisses and hugs made me want to heal and get better,” she says.

By February Barshop was able to return to work full-time (the second VSpot location opened in November 2022), and she did so equipped with firsthand knowledge of the issues women endure post chemo, such as early menopause, vaginal dryness and loss of desire. By sharing her own story, Barshop hopes to empower other women to seek relief.

"I just know deep within my soul that there is a reason this happened."

Cindy Barshop

“I hate to say it, but no one is okay after they go through chemotherapy. You have to work your body to be super healthy again, and that's internally too,” she says. “Once you're alive, you need to be happy to get healthier and feel better about yourself.”

She is staying on top of her own health, as well, with regular MRIs and blood tests. “You're never done,” she says of her life post-cancer, which involves 10 different doctors. But she is also seeing progress. “Everyday I feel better, everyday I feel smarter and more aware and on point,” says Barshop. “I know I'm going to be back to where I was.”

And on the tougher days she focuses on her purpose. “I just know deep within my soul that there is a reason this happened. I am here to help women through their pain and challenges and help them feel more comfortable in their skin.”

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