After battling bulimia in her 20s, Nicole Scherzinger is stronger than ever.
The Pussycat Dolls singer, 39, is opening up to Cosmopolitan U.K. about body confidence and life after overcoming the eating disorder.
“I’m more accepting of my body now,” Nicole tells the magazine. “I was always very critical of myself from a young age, and when I was 14, I started running. I would go outside in the middle of the night and run, because I thought I had to be thinner and that my thighs should look a certain way.”
Once Nicole headed to Hollywood, her self-confidence issues worsened.
“When I got The Pussycat Dolls, it really amplified that because it had so much to do with showing your body off,” she explains. “But you should embrace and accept yourself more. Don’t be so hard on yourself, and love your curves.”
Scherzinger continues, “It was very imprisoning and it stole all of my happiness, confidence and memories… A big part of that was during The Pussycat Dolls. I have a lot of fans and I never wanted to come out about it, because I was ashamed. But once I finally did come out about it, I realized how many people it had helped.”
In 2014, Scherzinger opened up about her “dark time” to the women’s magazine, calling bulimia a “horrible paralyzing disease.”
“That’s why I can empathize so much with people who have demons and voices in their heads, who aren’t nice to themselves. It robs you of living your life,” she told Cosmo. “But you can recover and you can get rid of it forever. I did it and that’s why it’s so important for me to share my story. I felt so alone… but I made myself so alone. You hide it from the world, you isolate yourself. But you can beat it — do not give up because you’re so special and you’re meant for such great things.”
Her low point came when her manager found her passed out on the floor. “I thought, ‘I’m going to lose everything I love if I don’t love myself,‘” she recalled.
That’s exactly what The X-Factor judge learned to do.
“Every woman has good and bad days,” Nicole admits in the October issue. “Mrs. O [Sharon Osborne] and I were joking the other day that sometimes we wake up in a puddle of cookies and crisps! But what really helps me is working out. Even if it’s not for very long, [I love] to get a sweat on to keep me focused and positive.”
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