Madden 24 threatens us with "anatomically correct" players

The proper Madden NFL 24 reveal is here with the promise of some cool features, but I can't get over the way EA's press release uses the phrase "anatomically correct."

Madden NFL 24 promises the debut of what the devs are calling "Sapien Technology," which is set to bring us "a leap forward in NFL realism by rebuilding the character skeleton providing more body definition and variation to on field physiques." The press release goes on to say that Sapien "makes characters more human and anatomically correct."

Now, I had to consult some dictionaries on this to make sure I wasn't going full dirty-minded here. The Cambridge English Dictionary defines 'anatomically correct' as (emphasis mine) "showing the body of a person or animal accurately, including the sexual organs." Dictionary.com makes it even more straightforward, saying that 'anatomically correct' means simply "having representations of the sexual organs."

Madden NFL 24 is rated E for Everyone, so it's probably a safe bet that we won't be seeing the dong of cover star Josh Allen rendered in-game. I'm sure 'anatomically correct' was just intended as a way to say 'realistic' but, uh, well, that's not what the term means. Not sure if this is better or worse than the time EA lost track of what console generation we're in.

Digs at phrasing aside, we do have confirmation of two notable details for this year's game. Madden NFL 24 will feature full crossplay across PS5, Xbox Series X, and PC, and all three of those versions will have feature parity with one another. Recent PC releases of Madden had previously been based on last-gen console versions, and PC players have been calling for current-gen parity for some time. That's especially notable since this Sapien Technology is exclusive to current-gen versions.

EA doesn't have an official presence on the E3 2023 schedule, but we may see its other titles show up at the Xbox Games Showcase or Summer Game Fest.