It hasn’t taken long for Gwyneth Paltrow to build Goop into a lifestyle authority — to the point where according to Fast Company, Goop’s vitamin packs pulled in $100,000 in sales on launch day. Now Paltrow is hosting a wellness summit called In Goop Health, taking place in Los Angeles on Saturday, June 10. And it promises to be … something.
So why is this happening? As Paltrow told Fast Company, “We have incredible access to the best doctors, wellness experts, chefs, and products, and we knew that our readers would find an interactive symposium like this hugely valuable.”
Let’s take a look at that value. First, there are three tiers of tickets based on the power crystal trend that has taken over the planet. Paying for a Lapis-level entry, which is the basic entrance fee, will set you back $500. It figures that the next level would be Amethyst, considering it’s a stone of prosperity. That level will cost you $1,000 for entry. And finally there’s the purest of stones and, assumedly, the highest of Goop wellness summit levels: the Clear Quartz. Clean out the change in your couch cushions, because this level of entry will cost you $1,500.
In return, you’ll get to experience crystal therapy with Goop’s resident shaman, try aura photography, get an energy-boosting IV drip of power-packed nutrients, and learn more about flower essence therapy, which is believed to alleviate issues like stress and anxiety. There’s also the promise of goody bags, which could turn out to be pretty baller, considering sponsors include Dyson ($400 hair dryer, anyone?), Bulletproof Coffee, Tory Burch’s athleisure line, Tumi luggage, and more.
Of course, Amethyst and Clear Quartz-level entrants will have the added bonus of learning expert foam-rolling techniques to work the kinks out of their muscles, and will be treated to a special version of “the Class,” described on the registration page as Taryn Toomey’s “no-sweat, stress-release variation of her signature, intensely cathartic mind/body workout experience.” Plus, Clear Quartz attendees will get to experience a sound bath, using crystal bowls that give a “calming effect on a cellular level.”
Amethyst and Clear Quartz ticket holders will also gain access to an exclusive Paltrow-hosted cocktail party, which we hope will include Paltrow-approved dirty martinis spiked with collagen. Meanwhile, Clear Quartzers will get to have lunch with Paltrow and a gaggle of A-list panelists, where one would assume they’ll get to discuss the intimate details of their colonics regimen and their experiences with vaginal jade eggs.
So who are those A-list panelists? Well, there are doctors and therapists including psychiatrist Robin Berman, surgeon and researcher Steven Gundry, and “medical medium” Anthony William (!?), but they’ll be joined by Paltrow celebrity pals Cameron Diaz, Lena Dunham, Nicole Richie, and designer Tory Burch. (What, no celebrity trainer Tracy Anderson?)
For her part, Paltrow says this is an important extension of Goop Wellness, helping readers to discover more about their personal health and explore avenues they might not have taken otherwise. “We’ve always been a lighthouse for wellness content that starts important conversations and pushes new ideas into the mainstream,” she told Fast Company. “We constantly hear from readers that some of the stories change their lives — they bring our questions and answers to their own doctors, request specific tests, and ultimately end up solving a medical mystery in their own life. Our readers crave more of that category, so delivering content, programming, and products is a major focus for us.”
We can’t wait to hear how many Goop devotees ascend to a higher plane once they receive their life-changing crystals, newly balanced chakras, and “wellness activations” — whatever that is.
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