Ever Cry After Sex? It’s Normal
If you’ve felt down or cried after sex, you’re not alone. (Photo: Trunk Archive)
Some of us have experienced it ourselves or with our partners, doctors know about it, and it happens to both women and men, but still it just seems strange to cry or feel down after sex. A recent study from the Journal of Sexual Medicine assures that crying after sex is a normal condition that affects nearly half of us at some time or another. An online survey of 230 female college students revealed that 46% of them have experience this sensation, called Postcoital Dysphoria, at least once in their lives, and that 5% of them experienced it several times in the past four weeks. PCD is marked by crying and feelings of depression, aggression, or anxiety. The sample of the study is small and limited, so the results can’t be assumed to apply universally, but past studies with different sampling systems have garnered similar results. A 2011 study from the International Journal of Sexual Health found that a third of women reported feeling depressed even after “satisfactory sex”. Researchers from the Queensland Institute of Technology blame the hormonal shifts occurring after orgasm, which also trigger post-coital headaches. The brain releases oxytocin during orgasm, a hormone believed to promote trust and empathy. At climax, the brain goes into a state unlike any other, so there are a lot of different reasons this could be happening.
But how can we explain why people still experience this phenomenon whether or not they orgasm? Other theories suggest that the sensation of closeness and intimacy with your partner breaking after sex could be overwhelming, or that post-sex is the only time people feel safe enough to express the other stresses going on in their lives. Alternatively, some sexual health doctors are investigating a weak correlation between sexual abuse and PCD. “In terms of feeling sad, depressed or emotional after sex, it is something that does happen, although the range of emotions can vary and data on this is limited, and very poor,” Dr. Petra Boynton told The Telegraph, and confirmed that many of her patients have worried about their male partners experiencing PCD.
Is it really reassuring, though, to view this common sensation as a syndrome synonymous with sexual dysfunction? Sex is an emotional experience and there are plenty of reasons for feeling down afterwards. Those reasons may vary among individuals, and studies should take into account the type of sex or the type of relationship that the partners have. Regardless of the reason, scientists agree that you should explain to your partner that this is normal for you and that it has nothing to do with them or their performance.
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