The 'Walking Dead' Brain-Dead Move of the Week: Never Trust a Guy With a Letter Carved Into His Forehead
Every week on The Walking Dead, someone does something stupid that needlessly endangers the lives of themselves and others. Here, we commemorate those decisions in the hopes that they won’t be repeated. But of course, they know they will be.
Alexandria’s walls came crumbling down in this week’s Walking Dead midseason finale, letting in hundreds of hungry walkers. But don’t worry: Everybody just got safely inside their houses so they can have their own little mini dramas and philosophical debates — one involving a prisoner who really wasn’t all that imprisoned.
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In the midst of a full-on zombie assault, Carol decides that now’s a good time to sneak into Morgan’s basement and kill that Wolf he’s been hiding in a bid to rehabilitate him. And she finds him being tended to by nurse Denise, with just a flimsy rope binding his hands together. Listen, Morgan, we appreciate this whole Zen pacifism thing you’ve got going, but when a guy keeps telling you he’s going to kill you and everyone around you, and has a freaking letter carved into his forehead, maybe you should use more than just the honor system to restrain him.
Well, that comes back to bite Morgan in the butt, because he and Carol have a serious knife-versus-stick showdown that ends with Morgan knocking Carol to the floor unconscious. But just as Morgan’s standing over Carol, the Wolf sneaks up and bonks him over the head with his own stick, and then grabs Morgan’s knife to threaten Denise. Another important lesson: If you’re going to have a knock-down, drag-out fight over whether a prisoner is dangerous or not… maybe don’t do it right in front of that prisoner? And for God’s sake, Morgan, look behind you!
But we haven’t even gotten to the worst part yet! Tara, Rosita, and Eugene burst in and find the Wolf holding Denise at knifepoint. He demands they hand over their guns… and they do it! What the hell? We thought Rosita was this badass military-type chick; she can’t shoot this guy in the head? Or at least know enough not to hand your weapon over to a murderous Wolf?
Luckily for them, the Wolf doesn’t decide to just shoot them all (which he very well could have) and instead takes Denise with him out into the zombie herd, where they'll… well, he didn’t seem to have much of a plan beyond that. But we have a bad feeling we’ll be seeing that guy’s ugly mug again — and all thanks to about a hundred bad decisions made by our heroes. Anybody else need a three-month break from these numbskulls?
Runners-Up: Rick, for almost sinking a hatchet into Deanna’s head when he thinks she’s turned and is about to eat Judith, telling her she can’t be left alone anymore — and then leaving her alone again! Take your own advice, Rick!… that little twerp Sam, for badgering his mom Jessie (“Mom. Mom. Mom!”) while everyone’s trying to walk undetected through a sea of walkers. “If you don’t shut up, kid, I swear to God I will take away all your vinyl records of weird old-timey music! I’ll do it!”
The Walking Dead airs Sundays at 9 p.m. on AMC.
