Scream Queens Recap: Red Wedding

Andy Swift

Chad Radwell lept to the top of Dean Munsch’s list of suspects on Tuesday’s Scream Queens — but not for the reason you might think.

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Special Agent Denise Hemphill revealed that her ex-lover was held back eight times in elementary school, putting him at the ripe old age of 30 — which is exactly how old the baby whose father was dumped in the swamp would be today. (I’m still not exactly sure how Dean Munsch and Co. deduced that the baby is the killer, but to be honest, I stopped trying to figure this show out a long time ago.)

And because not even a murder accusation could keep Chad from his No. 1 goal in life, he got down on one knee and asked Chanel to marry him — with an “extremely rare whore cut” diamond, no less! Sadly, the unholy union was not to be; on the day of the wedding, Chad was nowhere to be found… until his bloody corpse dropped onto the altar from the room above.

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And as much as we’ll all miss Chad, I think we can agree that Chanel No. 5 suffered the greatest loss here — she would have been an incredible doggy ring bearer.

Elsewhere this week…

HEADS WILL ROLL | Are Denise Hemphill’s years of accusing Zayday finally about to pay off? Keke Palmer’s character came face-to-face with the Green Meanie this week, but rather than slash her in the face, he/she simply stared for a moment before disappearing down the hallway. (Cheri Oteri’s character — a patient plagued with chronic orgasms — wasn’t so lucky.) So the question is: Why did the G.M. let Zayday escape?

THE BIG O | Another one of TVLine’s burning Season 2 questions was answered this week in regards to Dr. Cascade’s unusually low body temperature. During an especially erotic encounter with Chanel No. 3 in the morgue, the doctor revealed that he choked on his own vomit at a lacrosse party when he was 18, and he’s been dead ever since. (So I guess we can add necrophilia to this show’s list of storylines. Suddenly, murder’s not looking so bad.)

Your thoughts on Chad’s untimely demise? And since he’s dead — or so it seems — who else could be the killer? Drop a comment with your thoughts below.

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