'Survivor: Philippines': Parvati Shallow Recaps Episode 1
Parvati Shallow Recaps 'Survivor: Philippines': Of Idiots and Morons
[Warning: Spoilers ahead of you haven't seen Wednesday's episode.]
Let the games begin!
Ahh, the romance of a good shipwreck. Not much can top a season opening of Survivor.
As a former Survivor, people are constantly asking why would a person want to participate in the show. I reply, doesn’t everyone have dreams of being shipwrecked on a deserted island? Umm ... apparently not.
At the open, our daring new castaways drift about on the open sea in a ramshackle tugboat, trying hard to keep down their last meal. Thankfully, host Jeff Probst was close by filming his music video for his hit single “I’m on a boat!” and heard the kids were in need of a game starter. Cue the speedboat.
Probst excitedly explains the twist and another boat pulls up as he introduces the new players to the sausage fest of returnees Mike Skupin, Jonathan Penner and Russell Swan. (Note to you concerned fans: Do not ask Jeff where the returning women are unless you want an earful of chauvinistic, ignorant, man babble.) The castaways are then split into tribes of three and given a minute to pirate as much loot as possible before they’re tossed overboard.
Former MLB player Jeff Kent tweaks his knee, Carter rescues a chicken from a watery grave, Penner mouths off to Probst, and season 25 of Survivor is rolling!
For better or worse, bringing back a few dudes who were airlifted out of previous games makes for instant leaders of the three tribes. Although Russell talks a big game of not taking on the leadership role this time, he just can’t help himself. He jumps right in barking orders and snapping fingers. Although he’s already irritating the youngsters, starting a fire within the first few minutes of being stranded, may be Russell’s saving grace ... for now. The target on his back grew larger as he was spotted pocketing a clue to the hidden immunity idol. As always, idol-induced insanity will become a huge issue as the game plays on. I’m looking forward to it!
Zane, a likable Russell Hantz, is all tatted up and making alliances with every player on his tribe. Not the wisest strategy on Day 1, but I like his one-liners and hope he can make it work. Another one to watch would be the unlikely and slightly awkward alliance between hot bartender Malcolm and sex therapist Denise.
Is it just me, or does Mike Skupin make you nervous? He’s so excited for his second chance (and so starstruck by Facts of Life’s Lisa Whechel) that he’s slowly killing himself off, one injury at a time. I’m concerned he may end up chopping off an appendage before the show’s over. Here’s hoping Lisa, his schoolboy crush, can keep his hands off the rusty machete long enough to make it to the challenge.
Skupin’s got the right idea with his strategy of "going with the game." A lot of returning players *cough* Russell *cough* make the mistake of trying too hard to take charge and prove themselves that they end up sticking out as big targets.
The kids want Skupin around, which puts him in a comfortable spot. Investment banker RC is taking the early strategic lead, forming a giggly alliance with Brazilian temptress Abi-Maria, Dirty Pete and Skupin. Girlfriend’s got a big personality and huge boobs to match. I gotta give her props for playing hard right out of the gates and for attempting to rock an imitation of my Micronesia bikini. Get it girl!