'The Amazing Race' speed-cap: Without a leg to stand on
We had so many leg puns for that headline, y'all. "Three-legged Race," "bad leg"…we'll stop now. The real headline: father-son team Dave and Connor stayed in the Race despite Dave's torn Achilles, thanks to 1) Jessica and John giving up the Express Pass to the lame warrior, and 2) Dave's unbelievably fast crutching along on his injury boot.
But first, teams head to Phil Keoghan's hometown of Christchurch, New Zealand for the…
After a dullish first segment that's mostly flying and closed-airport non-drama, we get to the Detour: Rev It Up, or Reel It In. Rev is a driving course that teams have to complete, with both members driving, in under 83 seconds. Most teams elect to do that one, except Dave and Connor (Dave can't operate a clutch with his bad foot) and Chuck and Wynona. Those teams head for Reel to catch one fish at least 12 inches long. Chuck and Wynona are accompanied, of course, by redneck-style fiddling on the soundtrack.
Max, meanwhile, is accompanied by constant corrosive criticism from his frowny bride. "Why are you fishtailing?" "Who would have thought you're the albatross of this?" Credit for the use of "albatross," lady, but the real question might be why Max married you if you're this unsupportive.
Not everyone on Twitter thought she was the problem:
On to the...
I see Max and Katie from #amazingrace favorited a couple of my tweets. I was making making fun of Max in both of them. Oops... ;)— Brandon(@BrandonSufronko) March 4, 2013
It's a traditional (?) Kiwi obstacle course called a Shemozzle, which involves special shorts, a burlap-sack vest, and crawling through molasses and feathers and other mung while collecting chicken eggs. Nobody you'd expect to be a princess about it complains much, and Connor, well in the lead thanks to the express pass, kicks butt on the course while other teams get confused as to whether Mt. Hutt Station and Mt. Hutt Lodge might mean the same thing.
And by "get confused," in Max's case, we mean "endure a barrage of blaming from a snotty spouse." We don't think she's totally terrible in real life, probably, but has she never seen "TAR" before? "I told you so" doesn't get you to…
The "Finish" Line
But it doesn't cost her and Max -- yet -- because it's one of those "you are the first team to arrive psych now keep racing" mats. The twist this time? Dave and Connor arrive first, but have to decide on the spot whether they will keep racing on Dave's bum leg. Dave, tearing up again at the prospect of letting Connor down, thinks they maybe need to recuperate…and we cut to a "To Be Continued" screen, and "next time on" scenes that give nothing away about next week. Wait: there are monkeys.
It's mostly confined to Dave running (as it were) away with the Good Attitude Award, and Katie's "cold German" (per Max) personality, but an alliance is formed between Jessica and John, the YouTubers (who are seen at one point raising the roof in a speedboat; way to party like it's 1996, guys), and the roller-moms -- to protect against the hockey brothers. This is also why Team JJ decides to give the Express Pass to Dave and Connor, which is supposedly a big secret, but the hockey brothers totally hear the whole exchange. Bates (we think? We can never tell same-sex members apart until around the fourth ep) calls John "the sniveler," a Batman-villain moniker that doesn't really fit John but is still rad, and deems their team "the shadiest" in the Race.
Watch Mike White talk about his two seasons on "TAR" with Carson Daly:
"The Amazing Race" airs Sundays at 8 PM on CBS.